SEC diary.

I think it''s so simple, but actually, it''s so complicated.
I think I can hold the world, but I can not even hold your heart.
I''m so stupid

Today is very empty, I hate all things around me except studying. Yeah, job is boring, lover is being hated and closed friends are disappeared. Oh, My ghost, now, I''''m 29 years olds, but no good job, no money, no lover, no closed friend? Why do I stay in Saigon? For what? No purpose? I hate myself. What will i do for my future?
My forever lover is just a good friend, a truthly loving and a sympathizing man for my life. I call him forever lover because he and I can''''t give up private things to come on each other. I don''''t explain what reason we can''''t try our best, but I know that I love him all my life. Now he lives in a country side and I live in Saigon. And sometime long holidays, we meet and we go around the city, the beach, the cinema, ...and after that ... nothings ....
Every nights, before sleeping, I cry a lot, I remember him, I hate myself,... Day by day, I am older, I remember my forever lover much more, and I disappointed in the life...
Được roseforyou sửa chữa / chuyển vào 16:21 ngày 21/03/2007

Last midnight, I couldn''t sleep. I missed my forever lover. And I tried to find all reasons why he don''t like me.
Every reason, I also explained why I did that. And I also cryed a lot while I was writting. Afrter that I sent email for him what I think. I hope he understands me more clearly how much I love him, my first love.

May be some rock songs can help you!
I know love a person and receive nothing from that one is such a pain. But, sister! be strong! Make a tour to Dalat or some relaxing places, may the new climate help u thinking about something nicer ...
Sis, I''ve just 21 years old. have never been in love with someone, so I cant understand it deeply. just share with you my thought.

Thanks for your sharing....

This morning, I got up very early and tried to think that my love will answer my email. I changed the time I came to my company and hoped that I had happy thing in all time of this day.
But after I came there, I opened my computer and tried to check email firstly. But my Inbox was no new email. I was so boring, but I tried to think that my love didn''''t know I sent email for him.
I know clearly his company has a adsl line. So I composed a messge in my mobile and sent it to tell him that he had a new message in his mail. And I was worry about my action, I hope that he wouldn''''t angry about all true things I thought about why he did''''n love me. I knew he has got my email to read immediately. But I don''''''t know why reasons he didn''''''t reply my email. What is he thinking about what I wrote? Or he understood what I think and he don''''t agree with me? He don''''t care what I said? And He just wants to keep scilent in any situations? I Love him a lot, I miss him so much I and I also hate him, he is killing me day by day....
Được roseforyou sửa chữa / chuyển vào 00:04 ngày 24/03/2007

Finally, I was able to manage to refocus on myself to be back here to say what I wanted to say. I''''d like to send my apology to everyone including my dear friends for my sudden disappearance. I truly am sorry.
Được TrnHo sửa chữa / chuyển vào 14:04 ngày 25/03/2007

@: roseforyou: Do not be so optimistic! " There is more to life than just you". You have been so deep in love. Give yourself some times to think for yourself. You should care for yourself better think about him.
Firstly, Why don''t you think that he doesn''t deserve for your love. There are so many fish in the sea. And there are many good guys waiting for you. Give them a chance to know you and give yourself a chance to know more guys.
Secondly, I think that you need to reschedule your time. You can enjoy your hobbies in stead of thinking of him. You can hang out with your friends, reading book, walking, shopping...Release yourself. I suppose bot of you and he needs private time!
And the last, I wish that you can feel better. This is just my though. I hope it may help you better. Enjoy your life in an useful way! My friends.
@ SEC''s friends: I am so sorry for being far away from you. From now, I will try all my best to be better. Hope to receive your welcome. Thank you..

I would silently leave here, as I always do...
Where have you guys been? Too busy or because this SEC is only a virtual world?

Really sorry for that
I was quite busy to manage everything here. But now I suppose I can overcome it. hihihi
And I come back!