Boring Diary

Yesterday Ms Hanh said: "If you see him but cannot get him into your mind, you change the direction, and he stands there. You change the direction again, and he still appears. Then obviously he''s the man of your life. Just accept it. Why not? Why so in denial?"

It is the 3rd time I saw him by chance. Begin to wonder what he really means to me ...


Được Oceanborn sửa chữa / chuyển vào 22:53 ngày 12/01/2006

Today missing Ht. Everything seems to revive from the past. I just dunno. Once I thought that I could have forgotten him. Totally and completely. But now I know that i have been wrong... Going in the wrong way... ''Cos he reminds there, in the deepest and the most unrevealed part of my mind. Then when the time comes, he appears... to make me confused again.
sometimes i do think i still love him though. The emotion never seems to die, it just drowns itself in an enormous sleep. and it has just woken up after such a long long time, just like it did wake up somewhere in the past.
4 years has gone by...
Được Oceanborn sửa chữa / chuyển vào 13:45 ngày 13/01/2006

If you ever visit the village, remember me to one who lives there. To me He once was the love for life
Được oceanborn sửa chữa / chuyển vào 18:22 ngày 13/01/2006

The sun is falling, but the day''s gone without you. My heart keeps calling, I don''t know just what to do. When you''re near me. I seem to forget my lonely days. It''s more than a feeling, it''s something that can''t be explained now.
Wish that I was there, wish that i was there, when you''re not here, wish that i was there.
I just wanna see you a lil more. I just wanna dream of you some more. I just wanna be with you some more. I just wanna be with you some more...

I''m so afraid, but i think I cannot help feeling for him. It''s like something which is hidden deep inside my heart. When the time comes, it flares high again. I start to wonder if he is my love for life...

Is it possible for one to love two persons at the same time? . I just cannot explain. If only i could know for sure what i am feeling right this moment. Sometimes i fear i have to stand between the two different pathways. One for the Old and one for the new.
Remember me to one who lives there....

Do you ever believe in the so-called Miracle? And what marks the difference between Miracle and coincidence? What if the day i met him was called Miracle, and what if it had just been a mere coincidence? What marks the difference, anybody knows?
I''m so confused between the two paths. Sometimes i know for sure that i long to take care of him, love him and give him the best i can. Sometimes i think what i''m missing is another image...
Ain''t I that bad?

Today i feel calm and cold. Helped HA with his work, left my work unfinished. Well, yeah, ain''t I that bad!
Now lazing about in the room, i still got 3 exercises to finish. Just wanna leave something here before I drown myself into the work again. On and on and on, the life goes on...
Just listened to My heart will go on in Italian at her house. It reminded me of Ht. LAst night caught a friend set the status as one piece of "What if" lyrik, it reminded me of Ht too... I missed Ht and longed to meet Mrc at the same time. Until now, I still haven''t got any idea of who is the illusion, and who is reality...
I''m still standing in the middle of nowhere. Why does Ht always come back into my way when I''m confused the most? And he even makes the most become..."moster"

Yeah,very boring keep on writing.

Promise me that you won''t throw yourself at the people who are not yours :-<
Sheeeeesh