[English] BEAUTY FROM LOVE

Beauty from Love
Page 20



“I’m scared you want to put off having a baby because you’re not really sure you want to be with me forever.” I check the time on my phone. “Thirty seconds left.”

“I’m scared I’ll be a ****ty mother like my mom.” Not possible. She’s nothing like her mother.

“I wasn’t unhappy when you told me it was your birth control patch I had pulled off.”

She narrows her eyes at me. “I’d beat you senseless with a handbag right now if I had one handy.”

How can she think she’d be a ****ty mother? She already acts more like my mum than her own. “You’re becoming more like Margaret McLachlan every day.”

I hold up the phone and she announces, “Ten seconds.”

It’s her turn but I’m going again. We’re almost out of time and I have something to say. “I want you to have my baby … please say you will.”

She says nothing and the timer alarms, signaling the end of our timed confession. My heart and mind feel clear. Do hers? Or was that the worst thing we could have done?

That was stupid of me to ask her to have a baby during a three-minute confessional. I want to know what she’s thinking, but dammit, I can’t ask. We agreed this wasn’t about discussion.

I bet she’s pissed. She’s already told me she’d think about it and I agreed I wouldn’t pressure her. But now I have. And without giving her the option to respond if we stick to these stupid rules.

I have ****ed up again. Why do I keep doing this? “I’ll find somewhere else to sleep tonight. Just give me a minute to grab something to sleep in and brush my teeth.”

I take my sleep pants from the chest and go into the bathroom. I’m changed and finished brushing when L comes up behind me. She slides her arms around my waist and places the side of her face against my back. She’s shorter and smaller so her image is almost completely hidden in the mirror. “I didn’t ask you to sleep somewhere else.”

“You told me to forget touching you.”

“It doesn’t mean you have to leave our bed.”

I’m not trying to convince her to kick me out of bed but I know when I’ve ****ed up. “I wouldn’t blame you if you did. Even I know I’ve done wrong, L.”

“You’ve also done right.” She kisses the bare skin on my back and then her touch is gone too soon. “Even I know that.”

I watch her reflection in the mirror as she turns and lifts her hair. “Unzip me?”

I grasp the zipper of her black sheath dress and pull, letting my fingers graze her skin on the way down. I’m sure it’s the most action I’ll get tonight.

We’re standing in the bathroom and I’m peeling her out of a dress following an incident with one of my former lovers. This is like déjà vu because we’ve done this before. I recall being sent away that night, but not this time. She’s letting me stay.

I’d like to kiss her bare shoulder. It’s right there, so close to my mouth, begging me to place my lips against it, but I resist because I’m still not sure where I stand.

She catches the straps of her dress and eases them down her body. She wiggles as it slides down and tosses it onto the bathroom counter, leaving her in a black lacy push-up bra and a G. She’s hot as hell—like always—and I think this is my punishment for my earlier offenses.

I don’t think I can take this. She needs to be covered if I can’t touch her. And it doesn’t need to be any of that ***y stuff she usually wears to bed. As much as I love her in it, I don’t want to see her in it tonight if I can’t touch her. “I’ll grab you one of my T-shirts.”

“Don’t.”

She reaches behind her back and unfastens her bra before tossing it on top of her dress. I’m surprised by what she’s doing because even at her angriest moments, I’ve never known her to be cruel.

I close my eyes because it’s agony to see her this way when she’s already told me I can’t touch her. “Please don’t.”

“Please don’t what?”

“Torture me.” I wave my hands back and forth in front of her near-naked body. “Using this.”

“Torture isn’t my intention.” She pushes her panties from her hips and shimmies out of them. They drop to her feet and she kicks them to the corner, leaving her wearing only black pumps. “Something you said changed my mind. I want you to touch me.”

L’s forgiving me? Forgetting tonight’s events?

“What did I say to change your mind?”

“Shh … it’s against the rules to discuss anything we said during our confessional.” She steps close so her body is pressed against mine. “It’s two thousand fourteen. Let’s start the year off right.”

She begins at my top button, making her way down until the front of my shirt is open. She brings my hand to her lips and sucks my index finger into her mouth as she removes my cufflink. She makes a show of sliding it in and out of her mouth, her tongue swirling. Then she moves to my other hand to do the same.

****, it’s hot. I’m instantly hard.

She hops up on the counter, her bum landing on my hand towel, and motions with her finger for me to come closer. When I do, she yanks the front of my trousers open and drags my zipper down. She pushes my pants and boxer briefs to my knees and wraps her legs around me. I put my hand on her bum and easily slide her bottom to the edge of the counter.

She puts her hand around my rock-hard **** and slides it up and down her drenched entrance. I flex my hips, trying to get inside her but she pulls away. I expect her to tell me she needs to insert the spermicide but doesn’t. “Tell me I’m the only one.”

“You’re the only one, forever. It’ll always be you, L. Never doubt that.”

She wraps her arms around me and tilts her pelvis so my tip is pressing against her. “You’re the only one I ever want inside me.” She reaches around to my bum and digs her nails in as she pulls me into her … without birth control.

I don’t think she’s ovulating but this is still me inside her without contraceptive so anything could happen. And she’s not telling me no. Her body is telling me the complete opposite as her legs alternate between squeezing hard and relaxing as she rides me on the bathroom counter.

Her arms are wrapped around my shoulders and her mouth is pressed to my ear, enabling me to hear every sound her mouth makes as she grinds her body against mine. Every moan, every grunt. Even the soft, breathless sound of her saying my name when she comes, followed by her whispering how much she loves me.

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Her climax comes before mine but moments later when I come, I squeeze her hard and close when I empty myself deep inside her womb. “I love you too, L. Only you.”

9

Things have been surprisingly good between Jack Henry and me since our New Year’s confessional. Good isn’t the right word. Great is more like it. Who would’ve thought that telling one another our innermost thoughts would be so healthy? I like this newfound depth in our relationship so much that I may ask him if we can do it again.

Jack Henry asked me to have his baby. Becoming parents is something he began talking about before we were married, but it seems to be on his mind all the time now—which means it’s on mine constantly as well.

A baby. That’s what I’m thinking about as I stand in Margaret’s kitchen preparing the lasagna I’m making for Jack Henry’s birthday party tonight, per his request. My mother-in-law comes to me with a bowl of chocolate frosting. She’s baking his favorite cake, something she does for every member of the McLachlan family on their birthday. “I have extra. Want to help me clean the bowl?”

“Absolutely.” She passes me a spoon and I dig in. “Omigod. That is so good, Margaret.” And it is. I’ve never tasted frosting this delicious. I can see why this is my husband’s favorite but it makes me realize something. I’ve never seen him eat chocolate cake. Ever. I didn’t know Jack Henry liked it. I’m his wife so how could I not know that? I bet it’s this family history with the heart stuff. He exercises religiously and rarely indulges in things he considers unhealthy because he’s fearful of ending up like his father and uncle. I’d like to ask Margaret about it but I don’t want to introduce concerns if she hasn’t already considered them.

“Did they start work on your music studio yet?”

“They poured the concrete early this week and said we could expect it to be finished sometime in May.”

“I would think that’s soon considering all the equipment that’ll be installed.”

One can anticipate fast progress when she’s married to a man with money and high expectations. “You know Jack Henry. He sets the bar high and expects everyone else to as well.”

Margaret grins. “He gets that from his father. Henry is a hard worker. I’m not sure he would have ever retired if I hadn’t cut him off.”

“You cut him off of what?”

“Nookie.” I giggle because the word itself is funny but hearing her say it makes it even more so. “I’m going to give you some advice because you’re still a new wife—and because my son can be a little **** at times. I know; I’m his mum.” She looks around as though she’s about to reveal top-secret information. “Nookie equals power and there’s a reason he wants it from you all the time. It levels the playing field. Don’t like something he’s doing? Take the nookie away. Get the results you want. Need him to see things your way but he refuses? Withhold the nookie and he’ll make the fastest attitude adjustment you’ve ever seen. Want your husband to retire because he’s going to work himself into an early grave and miss his grandchildren growing up the way he missed his kids? Close the gates of nookie and get your husband home with you instead of burying him. That’s how you work it, darling. You use the power of the nookie to get the results you want.”

Oh, my. She’s a sly one. I could learn a lot from her.

Henry comes into the kitchen and opens the refrigerator. He bends down, searching for something, and Margaret sashays over to him. She whispers something in his ear and gives me a wink before returning to the sink of dirty dishes.

Henry grabs a bottle of water from the refrigerator and takes a big swig. “You girls have been standing in here on your feet for too long. Go rest a minute and I’ll wash these dirty dishes for you.”

Wow. What a sweet father-in-law. “Thank you, Henry.” I give him a kiss on the cheek as I pass by. “You’re so thoughtful.”

Margaret and I go into the living room and put our feet up. “Don’t be mistaken, Laurelyn. That was not the offer of a thoughtful man.”

“You used the power.”

“Yes, I did, and you want to know what’s so brilliant about it? I still love being with Henry after all these years so I’d have given it to him anyway. Hell, I’d probably have instigated it myself, so it’s win-win.”

“You are the master.” Margaret is so cool. I think I just fell in love with her a little more. “What time is everyone coming?”

“Seven.”

Perfect. That gives me plenty of time to go to the apartment and get ready. “Who should I expect?”

“It’s normally only family but we’re having extra guests tonight. Chloe is bringing the new guy in her life and three of Jack Henry’s mates will be joining us.”

“I didn’t realize Chloe was dating anyone.”

“It’s still new so we’ve not met him, either.”

Wow. A few weeks. I guess I’ve been too busy if I’ve missed something important like that. “That’s great.”

“I hope Jack Henry doesn’t try to shake him down too much. I may need to speak to him before the dinner—maybe ask him to take it easy since he can be hard on her fellas sometimes.”

I can see him being like that, but she’s an adult, the same age as me. “Why is he hard on them?”

“It’s how he is. He’s always been incredibly protective of her since the day she was born.” She laughs. “He wouldn’t even let Evan near her for the longest time.”

“I haven’t seen him be overly protective with her.”

“He’s lightened up since you came along.”

“I guess she’s glad of that.”

“I suspect she is,” Margaret agrees.

We sit with our feet propped and Margaret tells me stories about Jack Henry as a child. I can’t stop smiling because I’m picturing this beautiful boy with dark hair and bright blue eyes getting into the mischief she’s describing.

I wonder if our babies will have his eyes. I hope so.

“What are you giving Jack Henry for his birthday?” Margaret asks.

I’m still smiling but for a different reason and I can’t keep it from her. “I have a few things for him but one special gift. He asked for a baby and I’ve decided to give him one.”

“Oh, Laurelyn.” She cups her hands over her mouth to muffle a squeal. “A baby. That’s wonderful news. Have you told him yet?”

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“No. I’ll tell him tonight.” I have something very special planned but I’m keeping that part to myself.

“He’s going to be thrilled.”

“I know. I can’t wait to see his reaction.” I’m pretty sure it’s going to be a huge smile and then involve him taking me straight to bed.

Margaret claps her hand like a child. “Will you start trying right away?”

“Is tonight considered right away?”

She grins. “I have a bit of advice for you since you’re new at this.” She lifts her brows and whispers, “Put a pillow under your bum … after he does his thing. You shouldn’t get up right away; let gravity work for you.”

Omigod. Margaret is giving me pointers on how to keep Jack Henry’s sperm inside so his boys will swim upstream. This isn’t awkward at all. “Okay.” That’s all I can say.

“Stay that way about ten or fifteen minutes before you get up.” She giggles before giving me a wink. “I can’t wait to get my hands on another grandbaby.”

10

Mum meets us at the door. “Hello, birthday boy.” She squeezes me hard before hugging my wife. “Laurelyn.” She whispers something in her ear but I’m unable to make out what it is—just as she intends—and I’m reminded of another time when she did the same thing. These women get along too well. They’re going to unite and plot against me.

The old girl is wearing an unusually large grin tonight. That can only mean one thing when it comes to Margaret McLachlan. She’s up to something. “What’s going on, Mum?”

“It’s your birthday, son. I’m just thinking back on the day I gave birth to my firstborn.”

I’m calling bull****. “But you’re smiling.” She never smiles when she talks about having me.

“Of course I’m smiling,” she says. “It was a happy day.”

She makes a nice attempt at sounding sincere but I know better. This woman has told me about the day I was born countless times—mostly when I caused her some type of trouble or worry.

It’s not really a story that will encourage Laurelyn to want to have our baby but she’s bound to tell her about that day from hell at some point. “She was in labor, without any kind of painkiller, for twenty-one and a half hours. I weighed over ten pounds and she thought she would die pushing me out. I’m pretty sure she begged someone to kill her, although she’s never admitted it.”

Laurelyn’s eyes grow large and her jaw drops. “Good lord. Over ten pounds?”

“I did not beg anyone to kill me.” She playfully whacks my arm. “Not more than five times, I don’t think. But I forgot all the pain when I saw him. He was so beautiful, Laurelyn. He had a headful of black hair … and I’m glad because he was face up when he came out and his head was shaped like a cone. But then he cried and it was music to my ears. He was worth everything I endured and yours will be too.”

Laurelyn doesn’t need my mum hounding her about a baby. I’m already afraid I’ve pressured her too much, so I lift my brows as a warning. “Mum.”

“I’m zipping it.” She makes a motion with her fingers across her mouth and we follow her into the living room. There’s a crowd, probably twice as many guests as usual. I see several of my mates and I know Laurelyn will be happy to meet them. Then there’s the usual suspects—my parents, Evan and Emma with their trio, and Chloe. And Ben-****ing-Donavon.

I’m blinded by red. “Why the hell are you here?”

“Jack Henry. Ben’s a guest in our home.” My mum’s voice has an edge of warning to it but I don’t care. She can whack me as hard as she’d like if she doesn’t like what I have to say.

“No one’s answered me yet. Who invited this dick?”

Chloe’s giving me the evil eye. “I did, and he’s not … a dick.”

I’m feeling ambushed by my own sister—and maybe by my own wife. “Did you know about this?”

“No.” Laurelyn’s voice has a high-pitched edge to it, so I take that as a sign she doesn’t like being accused. “I only knew that Chloe was bringing the new guy she was dating.”

My sister is out of her damn mind if she thinks I’m gonna let that happen. “Oh hell no. You’re not dating him.”

“I’ll go out with whomever I want and there’s nothing you can do about it, so stop being a dickhead.”

**** me. I can’t let this happen. He’s no good for her and I don’t want him near my wife. “Chloe, there’s things you don’t know about him.”

“Ben told me everything.” I somehow doubt that.

“Hey, man,” Ben says as he steps forward and gestures toward the patio door. “Could we step outside to talk this over instead of making a scene?”

Yeah. I’m sure he doesn’t want to have this conversation in front of a crowd. It’ll only prove how unsavory he is but I also fear what he’ll say about me. He’s aware that I didn’t know L’s last name after being with her for three months. I damn sure don’t want him bringing that up in front of the family, so he has me over a barrel.

“We’ll be back in a minute.”

Laurelyn places her hand on my arm and whispers, “He’s here for your sister—not me—so behave.”

“Like that’s supposed to make me feel better?”

L lifts her brow as a warning and it’s the same look I’ve seen my mum give me a thousand times. “We’re here to celebrate your birthday and I’d appreciate you not getting into a brawl.”

“I won’t, love. I swear.”

We go out to the patio and I stand with my arms crossed as I wait for what he has to say. I can’t think of a single thing I’d like to hear from this guy.

“I want to start by apologizing for my behavior with Laurelyn.”

He’s telling the wrong person. “Maybe you should apologize to her instead of me.”

“I plan to, but I knew it wasn’t possible if I didn’t go through you first.” He’s right. I’m not sure I’d allow him to get that close to her. “I’m sorry I didn’t give you the information you needed to find her, but it all seemed really weird to me. You were with Laurie for months and didn’t know her last name. I assumed there was a reason for that and it was her own decision. I thought I was protecting her.”

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Protecting her, my ass! I know how much pleasure he took in denying me what I needed to know. “You did it while wearing a ****-eating grin. You loved seeing me grovel.”

“I won’t say I didn’t enjoy it. I wanted Laurelyn, and you came between us. I couldn’t see then that you were the one for her, but I realize that now. It was always you. I never had a chance.”

I’m not interested in discussing how much he wanted to **** my wife. That much I already know. I’m more interested in what his intentions are when it comes to Chloe. He stands to gain a lot professionally by being associated with this family. Or he could just be a bastard looking to give me a jab since he was unsuccessful at closing the deal with my wife. “What about my sister? You going out with her to piss me off or do you see her as an opportunity to further yourself?”

“I like Chloe a lot and our relationship has nothing to do with you or your family.”

“Just how did this relationship come about?” I ask.

“I’m in Sydney with my internship, so Addie introduced us a few weeks ago and we hit it off. I asked her out and we’ve practically been inseparable since.” A mental picture of an inseparable Ben and Chloe isn’t something I need in my head. “I have my own business connections. I grew up in a family of winemakers just as you did, so I stand to gain nothing in that aspect by having a relationship with Chloe.”

I still don’t like this ****er. “I’m not gonna bull**** you. I do not care for you at all—and I really don’t like you being with my sister—but she’s old enough to make her own decisions. If she chooses you, then that’s her mistake, but I’ve got my eyes on you. You **** with my sister—or my wife—and you’re mine.”

“I have no intentions of doing either, but you need to get used to the idea of me being around. I don’t plan on going anywhere as long as Chloe wants me here.”

****ing perfect. I’ll need to thank Addison for this **** later.

The party wasn’t a total bust. L met three of my mates—Trevor, Ellis, and Wade—which made her extremely happy. I guess she feels like that’s an area she knows nothing about since she hasn’t met them before. But there are reasons. They’ve been thick as thieves this year. I’m not sure I want to know what they’ve been up to because it can’t be good. And I’m sure I’d have been part of whatever they have going on if I hadn’t been so wrapped up in finding Laurelyn, but I have my priorities in order. They have theirs too: T and A—tits and ass.

All three were checking out my wife right in front of me, but Ellis was shameless in his adoration of her breasts. They looked awesome in the dress she was wearing but I still ended up telling them all to **** off. Doesn’t matter who it is, no one looks at my wife like that. Assholes.

They cackled, thought it was ****ing hilarious. I can’t believe I was once just like those dicks, but that was all before Laurelyn. She can’t imagine all the ways she’s changed me.

I’m driving us back to the apartment we keep in Sydney. I’d prefer to be home with L at Avalon for my birthday, but I wouldn’t dare go against Margaret McLachlan’s plans when it comes to an annual birthday celebration. She loves tra***ion, even demands it.

L didn’t seem to mind and I think it’s because she enjoys her new place in this family. It’s quite different than what she had growing up. She enjoys being surrounded by those who love her, and boy, is my family crazy about her, especially Mum. There was something different between them tonight and I don’t know what. Whatever it is, I’ve never seen Mum like this with Emma, or even Chloe.

“You’re not okay with Ben and Chloe.”

“No, I’m definitely not but what can I do? She’s not a child. I have to remind myself often that she’s the same age as you.” Laurelyn and Chloe are different kinds of twenty-three-year-olds. L was forced to grow up fast so she’s always felt more mature to me. As much as I love Chloe, she’s been spoiled by all of us, including me, so it’s difficult to think of her as an adult.

“Ben isn’t a bad guy. Take me out of the equation and you wouldn’t have had a problem with him. The two of you have a lot in common. I could see you being friends.”

Maybe, but L is in the equation. “I don’t know if I could ever be friends with him. He knew you were mine and still went after you.”

“But he didn’t get me and he never will because I’m yours and that isn’t going to change.” She reaches for my hand. “He was very sincere in his apology to me and I truly believe he likes Chloe for the right reasons. Please try to tolerate him for her sake—she really likes him.”

I better not regret this. “I’ll give him a chance, but his ass is mine if he does anything to hurt my sister.”

“I’ll gladly turn you loose on him, McLachlan.” L reaches for her phone. “Nothing from Addison. She and Chloe have been hanging out a lot since the wedding, but I’m puzzled about the reason she didn’t tell me about them.”

I’m not puzzled. “She didn’t want you to tell me so I could ruin it before it got started.”

“Maybe. She’d expect you to go ape**** crazy, so maybe that’s it. But she’s been weird lately—sort of like she’s checked out on me the last couple of weeks.”

Addison’s never been great at being there for L so I’m not sure why she’s surprised by this. “Ask her to breakfast when we get back to Wagga. Take her to Fusion and you can coerce the truth out of her with their Belgian waffles. They’re magnificent.”

“Speaking of breakfast, I’m going out to eat with your mum and the girls in the morning before we go back.”

“That sounds good.”

“What will you do while I’m gone?”

“Sleep in.”

She looks at me skeptically. “You don’t sleep in.”

“I do once a year because I need my rest after my wife gives me birthday *** all night long.” Her laugh tells me she must think that’s pretty funny. “Don’t tell me you find that humorous because I’m wrong.”

“You’re not entirely wrong but there’s more to it than that.”

“Partially wrong?”

“I refuse to answer that. You’ll find out in two minutes when we’re inside and you open your gift from me.” Nice. I bet she’s going to wear some ***y lingerie.

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We go into the apartment. L tells me to sit on the couch while she gets my birthday gift from our bedroom. I’m not so sure it’s what I was thinking. She isn’t acting like herself—she seems nervous.

She returns to the living room and sits next to me before placing a small rectangular box in my hand. It’s wrapped in chocolate-brown paper with a blue ribbon bow and definitely isn’t big enough for lingerie—unless it’s really tiny.

“Open it.”

I remove the bow and tear into the paper as I ponder what could be inside. It’s a simple white gift box. What is this? A bracelet? I hope not since I’m not a fan of men in bracelets, but I’d wear it if it’s what she gave me.

I remove the top and I’m confused by what I see. “A pregnancy test?” She just had her period a couple of weeks ago, so she can’t possibly need to take a test.

“No. It’s an ovulation predictor. It tells me when I’m most fertile.”

I can only think of two reasons she’d use this: to avoid having *** on the days she’s fertile so she doesn’t become pregnant, or the complete opposite—because she’s ready to. “And you want to know when you’re fertile because … ?”

“You asked me to have your baby, and this is me saying yes.” A smile spreads across her face. “A baby … it’s my gift to you.”

I lean over to kiss her mouth and stroke my thumb over her cheek. “Best gift ever.”

She lifts a brow. “I took a test earlier and I’m ovulating.”

It’s weird. Something about hearing her say those words makes me want to throw her over my shoulder and haul her down to our bedroom so I can bury myself deep inside her. “Does that mean you want to start trying now?”

“I do.”

“I love when those two words come out of your mouth. It means something crazy good is about to happen.”

I get up from the couch and tug so she’ll stand with me. I put my hands on her lower back and pull her close. No hug. No kiss. I simply look into her eyes. “This is what you want, right? You’re not agreeing because you feel pressured or because you know it’s what I want?”

She strokes her hand down the side of my face and I reach up to cup my hand over hers. “It’s all I’ve thought about since you asked on our honeymoon.” She laughs. “It’s totally insane to be married a month and try to have a baby on purpose, but it’s what I want. I’m ready to start our family.”

“Our family. I love the sound of that.”

“Me too.”

I clasp her hand in mine and lead her down the hall to our bedroom. “Can I have a minute? I want to change into something special for you.”

Yes! I knew she’d be putting on some hot lingerie for my birthday. “Yeah. You can have two if you need it.” She walks into the closet and comes out with a shopping bag. Whoa. I wonder what’s in there? “Take as long as you need.”

She gives me a naughty grin. “Be back in a jiffy.”

This is it, McLachlan. You and L are going to make a baby. There’s no going back after it’s done. Hmm. I’m surprisingly calm about it, but I guess that’s how it feels when you know it’s right.

There’s no reason to still be dressed when L returns. We both know what we’re here for, so I take off my shirt and trousers and place them on the chair in the corner of the room. I’m only wearing my boxer briefs when she comes out of the bathroom and stops in the doorway, leaning against the frame. She shifts her weight to one leg and places a hand on her hip, pushing her breasts up in her ivory chemise. It’s a bra at the top with sheer fabric flowing to the edge of the tiny triangle between her legs. It’s the ultimate prelude to baby-making.

“What does the birthday boy think?”

I walk toward her and she moves to meet me in the middle of the room. I’m remembering the times when she’s been her most beautiful: the night I met her; seeing her again after I thought she was gone forever; watching her walk down the aisle to be my wife. I thought she was beautiful all those times but the way she looks now as she comes to me so we can make a baby … it isn’t something I know how to label. Beautiful doesn’t begin to cover it. I’m in awe.

I’m overcome by the love I feel for this woman. My eyes fill and a single tear escapes. She’s trembling as she comes up on tiptoes to catch it with her lips. “I know.” This is a surreal moment for me. This beautiful woman has agreed to take a part of me into her body and join it with hers to make a new being—a little person who looks like us.

She puts her hands on my hips and walks backward toward the bed until the backs of her legs hit the mattress. She sits and glides to the middle. She lifts her foot and curls her toes around the waistband of my boxer briefs, pulling them, and me, in her direction. She uses her index finger to coax me. “Come here, birthday boy. I’ve got a little somethin’ for ya.”

I crawl up her body, taking my time as I leave a path of kisses beginning at her belly. When we’re face to face, she grasps the back of my neck. “Kiss me,” she says as she pulls me down so our mouths can meet.

Her mouth is making love to mine. Slow. Deep. Loving. “I love you, Laurelyn McLachlan.”

She stares at my eyes as I hover above and runs her fingertips down my cheek where she kissed my tear away only moments earlier. “And I love you, Jack Henry McLachlan.”

I kiss the side of her face and move my mouth down the length of her neck before reaching to unfasten her top. She arches her back, allowing me easier access to the clasp, and I can’t resist placing a kiss between her breasts, over her heart.

When I’m finished removing it, she lifts her bum and we repeat the same process with her knickers. “I’m feeling a little underdressed here.” She pushes at the waistband of my boxer briefs. “Maybe you should take these off so I don’t feel out of place.” She helps me push our last barrier away and I discard it over the edge of the bed.

Her legs are parted and I nestle my body between them until my hard **** is against her warm, inviting entrance. But I’m not quite ready. Making love is something we’ve done countless times, but it’s never been for this reason. This time is different. “This is about so much more than us.”

She’s trembling beneath me. “I know,” she whispers. “And it scares me to death, but in a good way.”

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I’m pressed against her, ready to enter, but I have to ask one last time. “You’re sure?”

She lifts her hips and my tip glides just inside her entrance. “Yes.” She squeezes her legs and brings me closer. “No doubts.”

I press my hand into the mattress so I can wrap it around her lower back. I lift to pull her hips upward and sink into her as far as possible—I’m sure deep is best when trying to impregnate your wife.

Impregnate my wife. I like the sound of that.

I’m moving inside her slowly and my hands move to skim the underside of her arms. I push them over her head and lace my fingers through hers. Our hands are joined as one, just like our bodies.

This is it—two will become three. Maybe. If things go well, this could quite possibly be the last moment we’ll share before our child finds its place in her womb.

I release her hands and move mine down her body. Her legs are bent on each side of my hips so I grasp them and push back. Laurelyn moans and I slide my hand between our bodies to the point where we become one. No beginning. No end. But I know L’s body as well as my own. She needs more so I find that spot—the one that drives her crazy every time I touch it—and stroke my fingers against the nub. A moment later, her breath quickens as she grasps my back and pulls me against her tighter. She grinds her hips upward so I know I’m right where I need to be. “Right there. Don’t stop.”

This woman knows better. I never stop until she comes undone.

Her legs tighten and I know what to expect next. And then it happens. Her inner walls squeeze around me, contracting in rhythm. Once. Twice. And then again and again until I lose count because I’m lost in my own world coming apart. Exploding.

I push her legs back and apart as I thrust deeply one last time. I’m making this one count but it won’t be a shame if she doesn’t get pregnant and we have to do this again. And again. I enjoy it right nicely.

My upper body is braced on my elbows as I hover above her. I’m still inside, unmoving. I push the hair from her face and she smiles, giggling. “What’s so funny?”

“I was thinking of all the extreme measures we took to prevent a baby and now we’re trying to have one.”

It’s called irony. “That’s what happens when your world is turned on its head. Things you once thought you’d never want transform into your greatest desire.”

“You certainly did a one-eighty.”

“I decided to go all in, baby. No folding.” I kiss her before pulling out slowly and rolling onto my side. “I never imagined myself loving a woman the way I love you. You changed my everything.”

She points toward the head of the bed. “Pass me a pillow.”

“Sleepy so soon, love?” I hold the pillow out and she takes it. “I thought we might try that again in case the first time wasn’t successful.”

“It’s not for my head.” She lifts her hips. “Help me get this under my butt.”

Okay. I get this now. She’s taking advantage of gravity, which means she’s been researching. It could be entertaining to go back and look at the history on our computer. “Where’d you find this tip?”

“Your mother told me to put a pillow under my hips and stay in bed for a while … after you’ve done ‘your thing.’ Her words.”

Oh ****. L told my mum? “She’ll probably call to see how things went. She has no boundaries when it comes to her kids and that now includes you. You know that, right?”

“I love your mom. We’re close so I ****d when she asked what I was giving you for your birthday.”

L straightens her legs and holds them in the air. Wonder if this is another tip from my mum? “Want me to stand you on your head and give you a good shake?”

“No, but I wouldn’t turn you down if you came over here and let me prop these on you.” I move over and hook an ankle over each of my shoulders. She puts her hands behind her head and her breasts have never looked fuller. Gravity always works for my girl, never against. “I’m not sure this helps the sperm get in there or not, but it won’t hurt.”

****, how’s a guy supposed to have his wife’s vagina staring him in the face and not pounce?

I smile down at her and she can guess what I’m thinking. “Don’t even think about it for at least ten more minutes.”

She’s got to be kidding me. “Easier said than done, L.” I reach down and run my thumb through her moist slit. “This is practically begging to be licked.”

“Don’t you dare, McLachlan.” She warns me but I don’t listen. I’m too captivated by what’s in front of me screaming to be tasted. I lean forward but she locks her knees around my head. “It’s not a Tootsie Pop. We’re not gonna find out how many licks it takes to get to the center—at least not for nine more minutes.”

11

Nine minutes seems much longer when your horny husband has his head between your knees staring at your stuff like he’s starving and you’re a buffet. He spent the entire time taunting me, using his filthy mouth to tell me what he was going to do as soon as I would let him.

And I am so turned on.

He’s describing how he’s going to lick me and I can’t wait any longer. “Time’s up.”

“Hmm … I don’t believe it is. I think there’s at least two more minutes to go.” Great, he wants to taunt me further.

I reach up and grab the back of his neck, pulling him down so we’re eye to eye. “Your mouth. On me. Now.”

He’s amused, as evidenced by his grin. “Now I’m the one who has a little somethin’ for you … and this drenched goodness below your waist.”

Oh ****. I’m going to die if he doesn’t put his mouth on me soon. Or touch me. Something. Anything.

I rock my hips on the pillow because I’m restless and needy. It’s excruciating and he could put a stop to it—if only he would. “Please don’t tease me because I don’t think I can stand it.”

He puts his finger on my pubis and presses against the bone. I lift my hips, hoping to coerce it downward, but he resists my coercion. “You mean don’t tease you the way I was teased just now while I was forced to look at this?” He looks down and drags his finger through my center. I groan and bite my lower lip as I shift on the pillow. “You’re so wet.” He strokes one labia and then the other. “Did you know this whole area fills with blood when you’re turned on? The action is very much like an erection.” He strokes me a few more times before stopping. “It’s magnificent to watch the physical changes that occur as you become more aroused. Your breathing increases and you get a flush across your chest. I’ve never sat back and watched your body change like this. It’s beautiful.”

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Beautiful? I’m about to combust and he’s telling me it’s lovely? “Touch me. Lick me. **** me. I don’t care which. It’s your choice but do something. Please.” Desperation. That’s what I hear in my voice.

I’m this man’s puppet and it isn’t the first time. Nor will it be the last.

I’m still on my back with a pillow under my hips. Not for long. He yanks it out from beneath me and tosses it aside. “Touch you, lick you, or **** you. My choice, huh?”

“Yes.”

“I believe I’ll do all three.” He flips me over to my stomach and I make an unexpected high-pitched sound when I land on the mattress. Jack Henry finds it amusing; I can hear him chuckle behind me. Then he’s at my ear and his voice is breathy. “You’re gonna like this.”

His promise sends a thrill straight through me and it concentrates in my core. “Whatever it is you’re gonna do, I wish you’d hurry up and do it already.”

“No instant gratification for you, Mrs. McLachlan. It comes fast and is gone too quickly. I want you to enjoy the anticipation.” He slides his hand around to my stomach and then down to the cusp between my thighs. “This is me touching you.” He cups his hand over me and moves it up and down. “And this is me licking you.” His tongue starts at the base of my lower back and he drags it up my spine slowly. He gets about halfway up when my body bows uncontrollably, sending my bottom up from the bed, arching in response to the sensation. That’s when I feel him enter me from behind. “And this is me ****ing you. All three at the same time.”

His weight presses my front into the mattress. I grasp the comforter and bring it to my mouth to bite so I can stifle my scream. All these sensations—touch, lick, ****—are too much to bear at once. Each thrust forces a moan, sounding much like an animalistic grunt, from my mouth.

He does something new when he brings his palm down and smacks my bottom. It’s not hard enough to hurt but I jump because I wasn’t expecting it. And then he squeezes my cheek. Hard. It’s not something he’s done to me before.

How can he work the front and the back like this at the same time? There’s only one answer. Talent.

His mouth leaves my back and is next to my ear. He takes it in his mouth and sucks it hard. I’m pretty sure it’s gonna leave a hickey on my earlobe. “I’m so close, L, but I want you to come around me first.”

And as if he holds the power to control my body, I do. Big time. I fist the edge of the mattress and scream, “Ohhh!” Each of his last few thrusts propel me across the bed and I’m glad to be holding onto something so I’m not sent face first into the floor.

Gah, he likes it rough sometimes. Good thing I do too.

He stills and lowers his body to lie against my back, kissing across my shoulders. He’s so tender and gentle—a huge change from the man forcefully thrusting himself into my body just a moment ago. “I see that Mr. Hyde has returned to being Dr. Jekyll.”

I feel him press his face to my back. “You don’t like Mr. Hyde?” He rubs his hands up my arms.

“I most certainly do. A lot.”

He gives my shoulder one last kiss before pulling out of me and rolling to the bed. He lies next to me, and I don’t move when he gently dances his nails up and down my back. “It’s ****ing ridiculous how much you turn me on. It’s like you have this crazy power over me and sometimes I feel like it takes over.” He strokes my lower back in a circular motion. “You know I’d want you to tell me if I ever do anything you don’t like, right?”

Is he talking about slapping and squeezing my ass? “I know, but don’t worry—I love everything you do to me. Especially this new triad of sensation—touch, lick, ****. I hope you do it again soon.”

He lowers his fingertips to my cheeks and traces them back and forth, occasionally gliding one down my crack, but never close enough to touch the place that remains unexplored.

I wonder if he’s doing it because he’s toying with the idea of trying it. I think I assumed anal *** was something neither of us had experienced, but the truth is I have no idea what he’s done with other women. Frankly, I’m not sure I want to know, but the question eats at me and I’m afraid it’ll continue if I don’t find out. His favorite position is from behind. Does that mean he really wants it the other way but isn’t asking me for it?

“Do you think it would be a mistake to talk about ***ual encounters we’ve had with others?”

His hand goes motionless. “I don’t want to know anything about you and Blake. I’m content with pretending the whole thing never happened.”

I’ve told him that Blake never made me come. Jack Henry’s the only man who’s ever done that for me, so he knows *** with Blake wasn’t good. I’m sure that leads him to think we didn’t do much exploring—and he’d be right. *** with Blake was always missionary and it ended with him getting off as soon as possible. End of story.

“What if I wanted to know about the things you’ve done with the women before me?”

He sighs. “I’d say no good can come from talking about it.” He begins stroking my back again. “You are my wife. Nothing before you matters. Nada.”

But it does because it matters to me. I want to know if he’s ****ed another woman in the ass. More importantly, I need to know if he liked it, so I’m going for it. I’m pushing all my chips to the center of the table. No folding for me. “Did you have anal *** with the others?”

His hand goes motionless again. “What do you hope to gain by talking about things that happened before I knew you?”

****. That’s a yes. Now I wish I hadn’t asked.

I drop my face to the bed but turn away from Jack Henry. I don’t want him to see how bothered I am. “I just wanted to know that I was the one to fulfill your deepest desires, not someone else who came before me.”

“L. That’s not my deepest desire.”

“But you liked doing it?”

“I didn’t say I’d done that with any of the others. I haven’t.” His hand returns to its previous motion. “I think all guys think about it. I know I do when I’m giving it to you from behind, but it’s not something you’ve done before. I figure you’ll tell me if you ever want to try it and we’d experiment, if it’s what you want. If you never want to, it’s fine.”

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The act seems so unnatural and unromantic to me. “It scares me.”

“Then we won’t do it. It’s not a big deal.”

“I’m sure it’s something Addison has done. I can ask her to tell me about it.” I lift my head and peer over my shoulder. “I would try it if it’s what you wanted.”

“My mates talk about it all the time, but this is what I know. ****ing you in the ass doesn’t get us a baby.” He kisses my shoulder. “I want all of my swimmers in the right place.”

Good grief.

I lift my head and roll over so I can look at him. I’m almost shocked by his words. Almost. He just used the phrase ****ing you in the ass and the word baby in the same sentence. I’m pretty sure that combination is just wrong, but that’s my ****man. No filter. And I love him for it.

“If this whole conception thing works out tonight, then we’ll have a baby before Christmas.” And before our one-year anniversary. That’s a little terrifying.

“If you got pregnant tonight, when would the baby come?”

“I’d be due on October first.” He looks at me grinning and I shrug. “What? I Googled it.”

Breakfast with Margaret, Emma, and Chloe turned into the two mothers giving me all kinds of tips on how to get pregnant. Between the two of them, they have six kids, so it appears they know what they’re talking about.

I return to our apartment after spending the morning with the McLachlan ladies and find our bags sitting next to the door. “In a hurry much?”

“There’s a rainstorm coming soon. I’d prefer to be home before it starts.”

“You don’t like driving in the rain?” Technically, I guess it’s riding instead of driving since we’ll be in the backseat.

“Not really. Dad and I were in a car accident in the rain when I was ten. I still remember the car hydroplaning.” He stops to kiss my forehead as he walks by with the last piece of luggage. “I haven’t been much of a fan since.”

“Was it a bad accident?”

He puts the bag down and points to his upper arm. “Broke my arm so bad, the bone was sticking out through the skin.”

I wince, thinking of the pain he must’ve endured at such a young age. “That sounds terrible.”

He pushes his sleeve up and I’m able to see a faint scar—one I’ve never noticed before—and I stroke my fingertips over it. “It wasn’t pleasant.”

There’s so much I still don’t know about Jack Henry, but I plan to learn it all.

I place my purse on the table by the door. “Can I have a minute to do a walk-through? Just to make sure I’m not leaving anything I want to take home.”

“Of course. You can do that while I take these bags to the car.”

I walk into the bedroom and the linens on the bed are thrown about from our baby-making sessions. I guess he has someone who’ll come in to clean after we’re gone. Or maybe I’ve assumed too much and it’s something I should’ve taken care of prior to leaving. Too late now.

I feel him come up behind me and his arms wrap me in a tight cocoon. “Remembering what we did in that bed last night? And this morning?”

“I am—vividly. There’s a lot of biological material on those sheets. I should have washed them this morning since we’re leaving.” It seems gross, and maybe rude, to leave the bedding for someone else to clean.

“I have someone who will come in to take care of it.”

Well, there’s no time for worrying about it now. “Okay. Let me take a look in the bathroom and then we can go.”

I go inside for a once-over and decide I’m all good. If I leave something, I can buy it in Wagga. Maybe. It’s not exactly a large town with a lot of shopping options but it’s where Jack Henry and I have made our home, and I love living there.

I’m walking out the door when something in the trash can catches my eye. I stop and look at the blue box I’ve become so very familiar with since our honeymoon—one of our many boxes of spermicide. I reach down to take it out and hold it up while standing in the doorway. I clear my throat to catch Jack Henry’s attention. “I see you trashed this. Did you take pleasure in doing that?”

He gives me a crooked grin. “Hell yeah, I liked throwing that **** away. It makes our decision to have a baby feel much more real.”

I’ll agree with that. It’s feeling very real right now.

12

We arrive at Avalon with about thirty minutes to spare before the bottom drops out of the sky and a raging thunderstorm descends. Laurelyn’s standing at the wall of windows overlooking the vineyard, watching the sheets come down. “I love rain. It relaxes me.”

I approach from behind and wrap my arms around her waist. “I don’t dislike rain, only driving in it.”

“It’s perfect for napping.”

“Then you should go lie down for a while and I’ll get you up in a couple hours.”

“I am pretty tired.” She looks at me over her shoulder. “Both of us were up late, so I think you should join me.” I’m not sure but I think this is an invitation for something besides napping? “It’s Sunday—Mrs. Porcelli isn’t here.” Yes. This is an invitation for daytime *** and perhaps a nap afterward. Both work great for me.

I tug on her hands. “I’m in.”

I lower the roman shades, darkening the bedroom. “You’re right. Today is perfect for napping.”

She crawls onto the bed and then moves to her knees. She pulls her dress over her head and drops it before reaching around to unfasten her bra. “It is, but I think today is even more perfect for making a baby.”

She’s going full force at Project Conception and it’s a total turn-on. “You’re really in to this.” I kick off my shoes and unfasten my jeans. I pull my T-shirt over my head and let it fall to the floor.

She wiggles her bum as she pushes her knickers down her hips. “I don’t do anything halfway.”

I’m moving to the bed when she tosses the white lace at me, successfully landing it on my shoulder. I grasp the nearly nonexistent piece of fabric and bring it to my nose. Her scent is intoxicating and I’m positive it’s impossible to ever get enough of it. I’m completely possessed by her. “Do you realize you hold complete authority over me?”

“Funny, I’ve thought the same thing about you on many occasions.”

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“I once chose to do things only if they pleased me. Now everything I do is for you because I want you to be happy.”

She crawls to the edge of the bed to meet me and puts her arms around my shoulders. She drags her mouth across my jawline toward my ear. “And I am. You can’t imagine how happy you make me.”

“Bet I can.”

She backs away and moves to sit on her bum before sliding to the middle of the bed. She spreads her hair as she lies down, a precaution she takes so it doesn’t get caught beneath her back. It’s crazy how great she looks—***ier than any woman I’ve ever seen photographed in a nudie mag—and she’s for my eyes only. I covet that.

She’s lying on her back with her feet apart and knees closed. She looks so timid and innocent, but I know better, so I kneel and place a hand on each leg and push them apart. She lifts her arms over her head and arches her back as she grasps the edge of the mattress. She knows something good is about to happen and I wouldn’t dare disappoint.

Touch. It’s so simplistic in certain aspects, and so very complex in others.

I place my thumb against Laurelyn’s clit, applying the slightest pressure, but I don’t move it. The brain is the largest *** organ for a woman, so I want her to anticipate what’s coming … to crave it. I want to hear her ask me to give it to her. I won’t deny that I enjoy holding this kind of power over her, the same as she enjoys the control she has over me.

She begins rotating her hips but my hand remains stationary, frustrating her to no end. I give her a few rotations of my thumb and she moans once before I stop. “Come on, McLachlan. Don’t do this to me.”

“Don’t do what?”

She lifts her foot to my shoulder and pokes me with her toes. “You know what. You’re teasing me.”

“I need specifics.”

She rolls her eyes. “You want me to talk dirty.”

“Yeah. I want to hear you say filthy things like a bad girl.” She rocks against my hand and I move it away. “Uh-uh … you don’t get what you want until you ask for it.”

I wait in anticipation of the nasty things she might say. What will it be? Finger-**** her? Suck her clit? Put my tongue inside her? I’m hard with anticipation but she shocks me with her words, as she often does. “I want you to put a baby inside me.” Her voice is soft and so sweet. It crumbles any of the bad-boy exterior I pretend to have.

I was set to have fun, to play dirty. I wanted to make her beg for an orgasm but hearing her ask me for a child changes everything. It brings out my tender side, a part of me I didn’t know existed until she came into my life, and it’s something she sees far too little.

I place my hands on her hips and rub my thumbs over her hipbones. “I can’t wait to watch you grow with our child.” I lower my mouth to her stomach and place a kiss below her navel. “I’m going to kiss your swelling belly every day.”

Her hand is at the back of my head, her fingers stroking my hair. “You’ll make a wonderful father.”

I move up so I’m hovering above her, careful to not press too much of my weight against her. “You told me you were afraid you’d be a ****ty mother, like Jolie.”

“We aren’t supposed to address anything said during confessional. We agreed, McLachlan. That’s the reason we can feel safe to say the things we wouldn’t normally confess to one another.”

“I know, and I’ll only make an exception this one time because I want you to go into this knowing you are nothing like Jolie. You are the most self-sacrificing person I know and your love stretches beyond measure. It isn’t possible for you to be anything but a wonderful mother.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.” She bends her knees and I pull back so I can move into position. She pulls me down so she can kiss my mouth and I whisper against her lips, “And this baby will be loved.” Her hands find mine so she can intertwine our fingers. She squeezes them into a tight fist and watches my eyes as I enter her. “He or she already is.”

She doesn’t take her eyes from mine as I move in and out of her. It feels so intimate, like she’s seeing straight into the depths of my soul, and it leaves me feeling spread wide, exposed. I’ve never felt a moment like this with anyone, and I love it. I want her to see all of me.

I’m sliding in and out of L slowly when I feel her legs come up and around my body. She’s coaxing me deeper so I thrust harder, bringing me closer to climax. I push her legs back and apart as I thrust the last time, filling her body with a part of myself.

When I’m finished, I pull out slowly and reach for a pillow at the head of the bed. I motion for her to lift her bum. “Upsy, love.” She lifts and I slide the pillow under her hips, repeating the same routine as the night before with her legs in the air resting on my shoulders.

“I don’t think my legs have to be up. I’m sure there’s been plenty of babies conceived without being in this position.”

She tries to take her ankles from my shoulders but I hold them firmly in place. “But the view is so very lovely, Mrs. McLachlan. It would be a favor to me personally if you stayed this way for a while.”

She grins while shaking her head. “You’re going to do it again, aren’t you?”

“Do what?”

“Taunt me until you can have your way with me … again.”

“The first time, we make love because it’s about the baby. The second time, we **** because it’s about us.” She pretends to gasp in outrage, but I know she’s used to the things I say so I rarely shock her anymore. “You didn’t come just now so tell me, Mrs. McLachlan, what it is you want.”

“I want you to rub me with those talented fingers of yours.” She takes my hand and places my finger over her clit. “Right here.”

I begin moving in a circular motion. “Like this?”

She closes her eyes and her words come out as a breathy whisper. “Yes.”

“You’re one orgasm behind me. I don’t think it would hurt a thing to play catch-up while we’re waiting. Do you agree?”

She’s rocking her pelvis against my fingers and can’t sit still. “I couldn’t agree more.”

“Then I have a task before me. A very beautiful one.” I use my thumb to stroke her center up and down several times before concentrating on the tight nub at the top. It’s her most sensitive spot and I alternate between fast and slow, hard and soft. She’s building. I can tell by her body’s reactions but I want to finish her off with a bang, so I lower my mouth and suck her clit. I’m inconsistent with the pressure and speed so she’s unable to predict what will come next.

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A moment later, she fists my hair and moans, “Ohh … ohh … ohh.” She unclenches her hand and her entire body goes limp. That’s when I know she’s in that place, the one where she’s blissful and euphoric. There’s no other feeling in the world like it.

13

I can’t believe it. Jack Henry and I are trying to get pregnant. Addison is going to **** when I tell her.

Daniel drops Addison and me at the Castlebury Hotel where we’ll be dining at the restaurant Jack Henry recommended. She was running late, as usual, so we’re doing brunch instead of breakfast.

An attractive hostess escorts us to our table and calls me by name—Mrs. McLachlan—when we’re seated. How does she know?

I lift the menu but I’m not reading it. “That was weird, right?”

I can see that she doesn’t know what I’m referring to. “What was?”

“The hostess called me Mrs. McLachlan but I don’t know how she knew. I didn’t make reservations, so there’s no reason for her to know my name.” My mind immediately goes to that place: is this woman one of the twelve and she knows who we are?

“You’re married to Jack McLachlan. People know him and they make it their business to know who his wife is.” Addison lifts her menu. “She’s probably green with envy that she’ll never get to **** him.”

I hope that’s the case, but if she’s one of the companions who came before me, then she already has. Many times.

The hostess is older than me but still young—not at all the type Jack Henry would’ve chosen.

I need to stop this. He’s my husband so nothing before me matters. He told me so last night.

Another woman walks up to our table. “Mrs. McLachlan. Welcome to Fusion Restaurant. Julie is your server and she’ll be with you shortly. May I get you something to drink while you look at the menu?”

I think I need alcohol. “I’ll have a mimosa.”

I expect the same from Addison but she surprises me. “Orange juice, please.”

I feel a little weird drinking alone. “Why aren’t you getting a mimosa? I know how much you love them.”

Addison touches her hand to her forehead. “I have a headache. I don’t figure it’s a good idea to put champagne on top of that.”

I pick up my purse and begin digging because I know she hasn’t taken anything for it. That’s how she is. “I’m sure I have something in my purse that you can take.”

“I’m good, Laurie. You don’t always have to take care of me like I’m a child.”

She’s never minded it before. “You’re being pissy this morning.”

“I’m sorry. I was restless last night. You know I’m a bitch when I haven’t had my sleep.”

She’s worse than a child without a nap when she’s tired. “It’s supposed to storm again later. It’ll be a perfect day for napping.”

We place our order and the food arrives. I still haven’t brought up Ben and Chloe but I can procrastinate no longer. “Last night was Jack Henry’s birthday party with the family and I gotta tell ya, Addie … we were pretty shocked to see Ben there with Chloe.”

“Oh hell.” Her eyes grow large.

“Why didn’t you tell me they were dating?”

“I’m sorry. I know I should have—and I meant to—but I’ve had some pretty serious **** going on lately.”

Addie always has serious **** going on. “So bad you forget to tell me my sister-in-law is dating your brother, whom my husband despises? Doesn’t make sense that you would forget something like that.”

Addison’s eyes fill with tears. She squeezes them tightly and big messy drops roll down each cheek. “Laurie. I’ve messed up big time. I mean, I’ve really ****ed up.” She carefully wipes the tears from her eyes using the corner of her napkin in an attempt to prevent smearing her perfect makeup.

I’m not oblivious to Addison’s tendency to be dramatic, but dread grows deep within my gut. “I’m sure it isn’t as bad as you think.”

Her eyes appear larger than usual as she looks up to. More tears roll down her cheeks as she nods. “Yes, it is, and I don’t think I can do the only thing that would fix all of it.” She’s sobbing and it scares the **** out of me because this isn’t my Addie.

I love my best friend but she’s selfish as hell, so there’s only one thing that would make her react this way. Something must have occurred between her and the man she adores with all her heart. “Has something happened between you and Zac?”

She makes the ugly cry face and then uses her hands to conceal it. “Oh, something has definitely happened between us. I’ve joined that statistic they warn you about—the less than one percent of people whose birth control fails even when they take it correctly.” Her body shakes because she’s crying so hard. “I’m pregnant.”

“Oh, ****.”

“Yeah,” she laughs, but not the humorous kind. “Me having a baby is definitely an ‘oh, ****’ moment.”

I know they aren’t married, so the timing isn’t ideal, but I don’t understand why her reaction is so extreme. She loves Zac. He loves her and they’re great together. I have no doubt they’d marry and be together forever anyway. “It’s a shock. I’ll give you that, but I don’t understand why you’re so upset.”

“Are you kidding me, Laurie? I’m not mother material. I’m too into me and what I want.” She’s shaking her head and looking at me like she thinks I may have lost my mind. “My mouth is too damn filthy. The kid’s first word would be ****. No doubt.”

“I think you’ll make a wonderful mother and I’m sure Zac agrees. What did he say when you told him?”

Addison looks away. “I haven’t told him.”

“Why not?”

She looks so sad. “Do you really think he wants to hear that I’m knocked up?”

I can only stare at her as I think of how happy Jack Henry would be if it were me telling him we were having a baby. I can almost see the broad smile on his face, his bright blue eyes dancing with happiness. I imagine him scooping me from the floor and spinning me round and round as he tells me how much he loves me and how happy he is.

But this isn’t happening to me, so I shove the daydream from my mind and return to reality. Addison’s reality. “I’m sure a baby will come as a shock for Zac but he loves you. I don’t think it’ll be an unwelcome surprise.”