[English novel] SOMETHING GREAT (Điều Tuyệt Vời)

Something Great
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“Sure.”

“So…go on.” She cracked the eggs. “Scrambled?”

“Sure…so…I got to sit at the VIP front row seat.”

Becky started to stir the eggs with the spatula. “You did? That is so cool. I wish I had been there with you.”

I crossed my arms and braced for what I was about to hear. “So…Max was there, too.”

Silence…she stopped moving…then there was the scream. “Are you serious?”

“Becky…stir. You’re going to burn the eggs.” I took the spatula from her hand and took over.

“What the hell, Jenna? Why didn’t you text me? Oh my God! You’re terrible.”

With Becky freaking out like that, I had to intervene. Opening the cabinet, I took out two small plates. “I wanted to tell you when we got home so we could talk about it.”

“Hell yeah, we’re going to talk about it…you’re going to tell me every detail of every second, every thought…everything else,” she rambled, still staring at me with her jaws dropped.

“You want to pour me a glass of juice while I take the plates to the table?” I asked. “And don’t forget your coffee.” Becky looked like she was somewhere else, so I reminded her of what she needed to do.

While we ate our eggs, I told her everything. I provided her every detail, every emotion that I had felt there…about the fashion show…the dress…the hotel…about Megan…and definitely about the accidents. While I spoke, her eyes were sparkling, and she was giggling like a schoolgirl. Most of all, she wanted me to thank her for cleaning out my underwear drawer.

Becky took a sip of her coffee. “So, what are you going to do?”

“I’m not sure.” My fingers glided idly around the rim of the glass. “Max said I had agreed to go on a date with him, but he hasn’t really asked. I mean…we don’t have a date set yet. And I need to see Luke so I can be sure.”

“I think you know the answer. But I understand. You need closure with Luke.”

I swallowed the last gulp of my juice. “You’re so sure of what I’m going to do?”

“Honey…your eyes are sparkling more than the diamond necklace you’ve described. Now that speaks volumes.”

I inhaled a deep breath. “I don’t want to hurt…him.”

“Well…too bad.” Becky’s tone went up a notch. “He should’ve made you sing hallelujah. If you snooze you lose, and that’s what’s going to happen to you with Max if you pull that string too long. Anyway…don’t forget we’re doing ladies’ night out this coming Saturday.”

“I won’t forget.” I was really looking forward to seeing Nicole and Kate.

Becky was right. I’d always taken her advice seriously since she had more experience with relationships than I did. After we cleared the table, we agreed to go shopping at the local mall. She suggested that I buy some new attractive clothes. I had to agree…she was right.

**

Monday morning was just that. It was dreadful to get out of bed, but once at work it didn’t seem like Monday anymore, especially when I got a warm welcoming smile from Lisa and the rest of my team. They asked me questions about the fashion show, but of course I left out many details.

Checking my emails and responding to the customers took up most of my morning, but I couldn’t help thinking about Max and wondering what he was doing. Reaching over to grab a pen, I noted I had a couple of text messages. Clicking, I saw the return text from Luke confirming our dinner that Friday. And then there was one from Max. My face burned.

Good Morning. I’m busy this morning, but I’ll see you soon…very soon.

Rubbing the back of my neck, I smiled giddily and pushed the phone aside.

After a quick bite to eat, I got right back to work. The office was filled with the sound of computer keys clicking away and phone conversations to customers. When the phone shook on the table, knowing the possibility it was Max, I checked it right away.

What are you wearing? T-shirt or bathrobe?

What?

Come to my office.

No!

I guess I have to try harder…please!

No!

Letting out a quiet giggle, which I totally didn’t mean to do, I peered up to see if anyone had heard. Thank goodness they were too busy to notice. Then my phone rang. The screen read Maxwell Knight. My heart did a backward flip. Should I answer?

Since I let the phone ring too long, my group all looked at me. “It’s a wrong number,” I smiled.

The ringing stopped. Relaxing my shoulders, I looked at my computer screen. There was an email from Max. Should I click? With my hand over the mouse, I glided the arrow to open.

Please come, or I’ll come and get you myself!

Startled and worried that he would come and make a scene, I stood up.

“Jenna,” Lisa said, holding the phone receiver. “Mr. Knight asked me to tell you that you have a meeting in his office right now.”

He called her, too. This must be a real meeting and not a flirting meeting. Crap! I need to get my butt down there and apologize to him. How was I to explain why I said no? I didn’t even know what the meeting was for, and I certainly wasn’t prepared for anything…whatever we were supposed to talk about. And where the heck was his office?

After Lisa informed me where his office was located—it was the last one on the right—I speedily headed down the hall. The only sound I heard, besides the thumping of my heart beating close to my ears, was the clicking, irritating sound from my heels.

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Brushing my hair with my fingers, straightening my black pencil skirt, and making sure my white blouse was buttoned, I knocked softly at the door that was slightly ajar.

“Come in. I’ve been expecting you.”

Grrr! I hated how his voice alone could stir up arousing emotions in me.

Pushing the door open, I walked in and closed the door behind me. The first thing I noted was Max’s eyes twinkling, seemingly enjoying what he was seeing, and that beautiful grin on his face.

“I’m so sorry,” I blushed. “I didn’t mean to…I didn’t know….” How was I going to explain? I didn’t even know what I was saying. I stole a quick glance at his big office, which was nicely furnished. A mahogany desk was placed in front of the large window, a few chairs sat in front of his desk, and a sofa was settled in front of a large bookcase filled with picture frames and books. To the right of his desk was a coffeemaker and coffee amenities.

“Jenna, relax and take a seat.”

It wasn’t a long distance to the chair in front of his desk where I was headed, but having Max stare at me like that made me nervous, and that darn clicking sound from the heels made it worse. Not only that, he looked so good in his suit and tie, with his arms behind his neck for support, I thought I was going to faint. Finally, I sat stiffly, and gave him a small smile. “Yes?”

With his arms folded on his desk, he leaned forward. “For someone so sweet, you can be very stubborn. But it’s okay…it turns me on,” he winked.

Yikes! He just did not say that. My eyes went straight to the desk.

“Anyway…after several texts, after an email, after calling you, then Lisa, you finally came. What are you going to make me do next time to get you to come to my office?” he chuckled.

I shrugged my shoulders sheepishly. “I’m…sorry….”

“I didn’t ask you to come so you can keep apologizing to me. Come take a look at what we have so far. I was at the shooting this morning. I think your idea was fabulous. I’m going to give you cre*** for this.”

I was pretty sure my eyes grew ten times their size as I stared at him in disbelief. “Really? I don’t know what to say!”

“Don’t just sit there, come take a look.” He gestured with his hand. “It’s on my computer.”

Feeling exhilarated, I stood up and started to pace around his desk. Unexpectedly, I tripped over a small wastebasket I did not see since my eyes were glued to the computer screen. Max stood up to catch me, but the weight of my body caused us both to crash on his chair.

With his arms wrapped tightly around me, my skirt had slipped up and I was straddling him. “Oh my God…I’m so sorry,” I said, my lips next to his ear.

“We gotta stop meeting like this, or I won’t be able to control myself,” he murmured as his chest rose and fell quickly.

Shakily gripping the arms of his chair, I pulled up somewhat, but I couldn’t get myself to stand. Max wouldn’t let go. Twisting my head to the left, I was now face to face with him. He was too beautiful. With perfect skin, a nice defined nose, and warm brown eyes that could totally melt you with one glance, and those lips…those kissable lips. I had to stop staring. My trance broke when Max spoke.

“I wanted to take you out this Friday, but I’ll be in New York. I’m leaving tomorrow, so I won’t be able to take you out to lunch on Wednesday either, lunch buddy. And waiting till next Friday is too long, so I would like to take you out on Sunday. We’ll have brunch. We can sleep in late together, then have brunch if you like.”

Trying to register what he had just said, I blinked. My mind told me to say no, but my heart told me to say yes, and so did my body. Becky was right. If I waited too long, I would lose him. And I didn’t like the idea of Max being with anyone else. Being jealous seeing him with that blonde model confirmed that I didn’t, and those hot, wet dreams that kept invading my mind and body…well…that just said it all. Before I could change my mind, I lit up a shy smile. “Brunch sounds great, without the sleeping in late together.”

“You said yes,” he squealed happily, then arched his brows. “Get your mind out of the gutter, Ms. Mefferd. Sleeping together doesn’t necessarily mean having ***, unless you can’t handle yourself around me. We can cuddle, just like this. And we don’t have to be just lunch buddies, we can be cuddle buddies.”

I smirked. “Is that a challenge, Mr. Knight? We can try one day.” I couldn’t believe those words escaped my mouth, but with Max, it was so easy.

His lips curled into a huge grin as he arched his brows in astonishment, most likely thinking he couldn’t believe I said it either. “I like challenges. You’re on.”

I gulped my nerves down. “Can I get up now?”

“You need my hand service. Let me help you,” he said with a cool, steady tone.

Oh no!

Purposely, his hands on my back gingerly, carefully, caressed down my spine, making me quiver in all the right places. Then his hands slid to my sides, over the material that had gathered up, then to my exposed thighs. I sucked in air hard, and I knew Max heard it because of a satisfied grin on his face. Feeling his touch, his hands felt so smooth, so sensual across my legs as he lifted me up, but I wasn’t standing.

Losing my mind and control, I was still utterly dazed, and sucked in more air when his face was inches away from my chest. My breathing was heavy and fast, and so was Max’s. I felt the warm air he exhaled way down south. Panting and worried that someone may walk in, I turned my head to the door.

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Max’s arms around my upper legs were now dangling by his side. “Don’t worry, Ms. Mefferd. It’s locked. I made sure of it.”

“I’m…I mean…I’m not worried.” I struggled to get up, but just before I did, Max twirled his chair and I ended up in his lap with my back toward him, facing the computer, locked between the table and him. How the hell did he do that so fast?

“Don’t bite your finger, Ms. Mefferd.” He guided my finger out of my mouth and kissed it. “Next time, it’s going in my mouth.”

My body stiffened from the small short kiss and the thought of it going inside his mouth.

“Now that we can concentrate better, here is the front cover.”

And there it was, just as beautiful and stunning as I remembered it to be. The model did it justice, and so had Max with the layout.

Chapter 20

It was going to be our last date, so why did I worry so much? Perhaps it was the fact that I was going to break Luke’s heart, or the guilty feeling washing over me…guilt for not telling Luke about Max before, and guilt for going out with Luke and not telling Max. But Max was in New York, and I needed to break up with Luke in person and not over the phone.

Luke picked me up, but this time it was awkward, perhaps from knowing that it would be our last dinner together…well, at least I knew. Instead of dressing up, I wore jeans and a sweater. I guessed it was a way for me to express that this wasn’t a date. However, Luke was dressed a little bit more than casual since he had just gotten off work.

“How was your trip?” he asked, cutting his steak with a knife.

Thinking about Max and what happened, my face felt warm. “It was great. I enjoyed it,” I replied, twirling the linguini with my fork.

“I can tell…I mean…since you didn’t reply back much, I figured you were very busy.”

I gulped guilt down my throat. “Yes…very busy.” Feeling the vibration from my purse, I checked. It was from Max. Max had called and texted me everyday. We flirted a lot on the phone and by text, which made me miss him even more. Though we hadn’t even kissed yet, the powerful, raw emotion he stirred inside me felt like we had, and a lot more.

“Excuse me,” I said, and read his text.

What are you doing?

Thinking of you.

Good. You know what I’m thinking of?

What?

You wearing my T-shirt or the robe.

Keep thinking that.

Not quite sure what that means. I have a surprise for you.

You don’t need to give me another surprise. I love the roses you sent again.

There are a lot of fun things you can do with the rose petals on your naked body.

I’m sure there are…lol! Gotta go.

Feeling hot from his words, my finger went up to my lips then stopped. Giggling inwardly, I thought about how many times Max had to take my finger out of my mouth. Oddly, I never had the urge to put my finger in my mouth with Luke. Placing my phone back, I peered up to see Luke chewing on his steak, staring at me with an irritated expression. “Sorry about that.”

“That’s okay,” he said sharply.

I felt a sting of anger so I took a sip of my water. While playing with my food, my heart pounded from nervousness as I built up the courage to tell Luke it was over.

“Max.”

Oh shoot!

His eyes shot daggers at me and then looked away.

That was just great. I didn’t need that evil eye thrown at me. Flushing redder than his wine, I built up the courage again and continued as if nothing happened. “Luke…there is something we need to talk about.”

“I need to talk to you too,” he said with a full mouth. He didn’t even let me continue, nor did he even look at me. “Listen, I don’t think this is going to work. Don’t get me wrong. I think you’re attractive, but obviously we don’t have much in common.”

Is he kidding me? I wanted to break up with him. He’s breaking up with me? And all this time I was worried about his feelings, and obviously he didn’t care about mine. What the hell? Had I known he was going to do this, I would have told him to meet me here instead, or just done it over the phone. Wait…he should have asked me to meet him here. Why would he pick me up unless this wasn’t planned? He didn’t take me out to break up…he must have sensed it from my lack of attention to him, and by me telling him we needed to talk…and especially since I called him another name.

“We can still be friends,” he continued, cutting his steak a little bit harder than before.

The rest of the dinner was awkward. Still be friends, my butt. I didn’t even want to see him after that. Wanting to be cool about it, and especially since he was my ride home, I just gave him a fake smile. “Sure.”

Awkward silence filled the air on the way home, so I glanced out the window to pass the time. Only a few stars graced us tonight, but it very dim and sad looking, like me. It wasn’t the fact that our short-term relationship was broken, it was the feeling of how strange it would be to run into him again after tonight, if that ever happened. And if we did, would we ignore one another and pretend we never knew each other? That was the saddest part of breaking up.

Sure, we could be friends, but come on. The chances of that happening were slim to none. I’d seen it happen many times with my friends’ relationships. It was almost impossible to be friends afterwards. And here I was, sitting in his car, thinking this was the last time we’d ever see each other, and that was very depressing because in a way, he was my friend.

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Luke wasn’t like Max, but he didn’t treat me badly. He wasn’t a perfect gentleman, but at least…nah. I didn’t want to think of reasons to make him look better than he was. Turning off the ignition, Luke didn’t say a word. The headlights behind us blinded me for a second from a flash of their high beams. Seriously, was that even necessary? We know you are parked behind us.

Stepping out of the car because I knew Luke wasn’t going to open my door, I swung around to see him in front of me.

“Jenna, look. What I said back at the restaurant…I didn’t really mean it.”

“What?” I was confused. Did I hear him right? “Luke…don’t—”

“Please…I was upset. You didn’t want to come with me to San Francisco, and you hardly returned my texts or my calls in New York. Then you called me Max. Who the hell is Max?”

“Luke, please. This is over, and you need to go.”

“Just think about it…okay?” Luke’s eyes were pleading. “I’m sorry that I didn’t call you enough or take you out enough. It’s just that…I wanted someone who was more driven, career orientated, someone bolder, with more self-confidence. Now I see that you are…but in your own special way. Just give me one more chance.”

I couldn’t look at him. It was too late. His words alone confirmed that I didn’t ever want to see him again. He didn’t even see the real me while we were dating, but Max did from the very beginning. When I didn’t respond, he continued.

“I’ll call you later. Maybe we both need to sleep on this.” Without warning, Luke looped his arms around me so tightly I couldn’t break away.

“Luke…I can’t breathe.”

“Sorry. Just think about it.”

Exhaling deeply, because this was how I had imagined this might play out, I focused my eyes on the tree across the street and thought about how I should respond.

“Jenna,” Luke said, breaking me out of my thoughts. “Maybe you’ll change your mind after this.”

When I peered up, Luke’s lips crashed into mine. I was taken aback, and it took me a few seconds to push him away, but his body weight on mine made it difficult. As I struggled to break away, he finally let go. Without a word he got into his car and took off, and I stood there feeling staggered as to how that had happened. I didn’t even enjoy it.

What happened next spun my world upside down…and then some. Max stood frozen, with his body halfway out of the car, his eyes searing with hurt and anger. I opened my mouth to speak, but nothing came out; and to make it worse, my legs were planted to the ground and I couldn’t run to him. All I could think at that moment was how much he had seen.

“Max? I thought you were in New York.” I managed to mutter, and started toward him.

“Stop! Don’t take another step. You were sure thinking of me.”

Before I could say another word, he got in the car and sped away. My heart dropped within seconds of his absence. He might as well have run over it. Feeling the sting in my eyes, I let them fall. And seeing a dozen red roses on the ground where he’d thrown them, I welcomed the pouring tears even more.

Chapter 21

“Are you going to lie in bed all day?” Becky asked, lying next to me. “He’ll come around. After you explain, he’ll know what a fool he’s been…that arrogant bastard.”

With a Kleenex tissue in one hand, I wiped my tears. “I should have tried harder to push Luke away. I should have bit him, or kneed him, but it didn’t come to mind when it happened so fast.”

“I know. It’s not your fault. Men are so stupid. Sure…just run away.”

“The funny thing is, Max and I hadn’t even kissed. We didn’t even go on a date, but I feel such a strong connection to him it’s kind of frightening. I mean…look at me. I’m a mess, as if we broke up after a long relationship.” I let out a short laugh. Sitting up, I blew my nose.

Becky paced to the door and held onto the frame of it. “Nicole and Kate are coming soon. I’m going to prepare a chicken dish. You lay here and mope all you like, but when they come, hell…whatever. Let’s have a moping fest. I have some moping to do myself.”

“Thanks, Becky. Next time I’ll cook. I don’t know what I would do without you. You know that, don’t you?”

Becky ran to me and wrapped her arms around me. “I know. And just so you know, even though you think I’m here more for you than you are for me, you’re totally wrong. You were there for me in college way more than I could ever make up for. You took care of me when I was wasted, you helped me through bad breakups…and don’t forget how you helped me with the classes I almost failed…okay? I’m just glad that we have wonderful friends we can count on. You know what I mean.”

Still holding on to Becky, I nodded. I knew exactly what she meant.

**

“Nicole, Kate,” I squealed, embracing them in my arms.

“Missed you too,” Nicole said, returning the hug, then let go.

Kate, the more affectionate one, kissed me on the cheek and handed me a bottle of wine. “So…tell us all about New York.”

After packing our plates with food and a glass of wine, and water for Kate, who was still breastfeeding, we sat at the table in our usual spots. With all eyes on me, I told them everything that happened in and out of New York.

“Sounds like Max was really hurt by seeing you with Luke,” Nicole said, sticking a fork into the chicken. “I don’t blame him though. If I had been there when that happened, I would’ve thought the same thing. I mean…I’m not siding with him, but he’s been after you for some time, and when he finally gets you…well…you know what I mean. It’s sort of like giving your heart away to have it handled with care and caution, but instead, it gets stepped on, flattened on the ground, squashed, mutilated, ripped apart—”

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“Okay. I think she got the point,” Becky intervened, seeing the crushed look on my face. “You’re making it worse, Nicole,” she scolded.

“Sorry. I didn’t mean…I was thinking about the time when I was…I’m so sorry.” Nicole apologized and placed her hand over mine.

“After you have a chance to talk, he’ll come around,” Kate mumbled with a mouth full of fruit salad.

“That’s what I keep telling her, but Max doesn’t answer her texts or phone calls. That’s the problem,” Becky explained, pouring a second round of wine in her glass and doing the same for Nicole.

“What did you say in the text?” Kate asked.

Taking a sip and holding lazily onto the wine glass, I stared at the space where the vase of roses was. My mind reverted for a bit as I recalled the red roses Max had tossed on the street. I was in shock and hadn’t had the energy to pick them up. I wondered if I should go back out and do so, but I couldn’t get my legs to move. They were probably gone by now anyway. Knowing Max, he would have gotten the expensive kind, like the last two times he had gotten them for me. Surely someone would have picked them up. Those flowers were not meant for me…anymore.

“Jenna,” Kate called, bringing me back to our conversation.

“Ummm…I texted that we need to talk, and that it wasn’t what he thought it looked like. I can’t text everything I need to tell him.”

“True.”

Becky poured more wine into my glass. I hadn’t realized I had emptied it…well…half of it anyway, but I knew I was buzzed. It was confirmed when I began feeling like I had been out in the sun way too long.

“I know you can’t drink, but you’re home, and we’re here. Drown out your sorrows, hun. We’ll take care of you.”

Looking from my half-eaten plate to Becky’s eyes, I gave her the most thankful smile I could give. “Thanks. After this drink, I won’t be able to think or…feel.” And that was fine with me. I didn’t want to feel…anything.

“Dang, Jenna. I’ve seen you turn red before, but you look like a lobster,” Nicole snorted. “I see why Max was so worried about you. I’m worried for you right now. Are you okay?”

“Don’t worry,” I sighed, feeling my heart thumping faster. Not only that, my head started to throb, my body was burning, and every movement seemed slowed. Pausing for a second, trying to process my thoughts, I changed the subject. “Soooo…Kate. Are you…still…breastfeeding?”

Kate held an amused smile. “Someone is buzzed,” she giggled, touching my cheeks. Her hand felt so cool to touch. Enjoying the sensation, I closed my eyes and opened them when she spoke again. “I’m weaning her off so I still can’t drink, but once I’m done…well, no need to ask no further, girl friend.” She accentuated the word girl friend with a funny accent.

With the palm of my hand on my cheek and my elbow on the table *****pport my head, I shifted my eyes to Nicole. The whole dinner conversation was about me, and I didn’t want it to be about me anymore. Plus, I was certain my friends had things to share. “How…about…you, Nicole?” I wasn’t sure what I had asked. Every word in my ears seemed like an echo and slowed.

Her whole face was beaming while her body shuddered slightly. She looked like she was about to explode. “I can’t hide it any longer.” She stood up, pulled something out of her pocket, and sat back down. Doing something with her left hand underneath the table, she smiled mischievously.

“Hurry up,” Kate shook her hands.

I yawned and put my head down on the comfort of my crossed arms on the table.

“Be patient. I hope this is the last one I’ll ever have,” Nicole said excitedly. “I dare you not to get excited.”

“Ahhh!” I heard the screams from all three of my friends. Popping my head up, I saw Nicole’s hand up in the air and something very shiny on her finger. “Nicole?” I stood up and pulled her finger closer to me. It took a great amount of effort to peel my eyes open. From what I could tell, it was bigger than a karat…a round, gorgeous ring. “You’re en…raged?” I shook my head. “En..gaged?”

Nicole giggled. “Yes…I’m engaged.”

I embraced her with all of me. “I…sooo…hapeee…for…me…you,” I slurred, running my hand down my face, trying to focus.

“When did this happen? Didn’t you guys break up?” Becky asked, looking confused.

“Yeah…well…we did a lot of talking the past week. We spilled our guts and got everything out in the open. At the end, he said he couldn’t live without me. We got back together…which I didn’t tell you about. And then he proposed last night.”

“Details…we want details,” Kate blurted.

“It’s coming…hold on, impatient one,” Nicole giggled. “I need to ask you guys a question.” Draping her hand over my shoulder, she looked at each of us with a heartfelt smile while water pooled in her eyes. “When I need a helping hand, you’re always there for me. When I’m down and I need someone to lift me up, you’re always there for me. I’m so blessed to have you in my life. My life wouldn’t be fulfilling and the same without all of you. Will you all be my bridesmaids?”

Next thing I knew, I heard sniffles from all three of my friends and lots of arms wrapped around Nicole and I. Pure joy filled my heart and soul. Though I was hot as hell from the alcohol, I welcomed this special warmth. How I loved my friends.

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Chapter 22

Sunday was the slowest day of my life. Whatever I was doing, my eyes were glued to my phone in hopes that Max would call or text back, but he didn’t. Luke called me several times, but I ignored him. A part of me blamed him for what had happened, but I didn’t want to think of him, so I brushed the thought of him out of my mind. But every time I thought about that awful, unwanted kiss and the “what if’s”, I saw Max’s expression and it killed me.

Becky left a note, letting me know she would be back before dinner. She had gone out to run some errands since she would be going to San Francisco for a literature convention. Having alone time, I sat on the sofa with the cell phone on my lap, just staring. That felt pathetic. I looked pathetic. Being that tomorrow was Monday and I needed to be at work, I had to snap out of it. Needing to hear a comforting voice besides my friends, I called my mom on her cell phone.

“Jenna?”

“Hi, Mom.” I tried to sound cheerful, but instead my lips quivered. I had to hold it together or I’d start sobbing on the phone. Mom would worry, then I would have to talk about my love life, which I wasn’t comfortable doing.

“How are you, sweetie? It’s good to hear your voice.”

Pausing, I took a deep breath. “It’s good to hear your voice too.” I’ve been better, I wanted to tell her, but that would sound suspicious, so I lied. “I’m great, just busy with my new job. How’s Dad and…anything new?”

“Just the same old thing. Will you have a chance to visit?”

“Christmas for sure, Mom. I’ll be there.”

“Fantastic. I’ll tell Dad. I can’t wait.”

“Me, too.” I paused for a second, pondering if I should ask her this question, but I needed to know. “Hey, Mom?” My voice sounded like I was a child again.

“What is it, hun? Is everything okay?”

“Everything is fine…I was just wondering. Did you love Dad when you first met him? I mean…how did you know he was the one?”

“I can’t explain it. I just knew. I knew that I couldn’t live without him. So when that time comes, make sure to pick the one you can’t live without. The one that makes you levitate off the floor and never lets you touch the ground. The one that loves you so much, he’ll put you first, above anything else. The one that will love you on the sunny days, but he’ll love you most of all through the heavy, thunderous storms. Let him pamper you, shelter you, and romance you till he’s given his all. And in return, love hard and give back everything you’ve got. You deserve all the happiness, Jenna. Don’t settle for anything less.”

“Okay.” I nodded, though she couldn’t see me. As a tear escaped down my cheek, I quickly wiped it away. I thought about how her words were enduring and took them to heart, glad that I’d asked her. It made me re-evaluate the men in my life.

“Oh…before I forget, I want to let you know that Dad and I will be on a cruise for the first two weeks of December. We’re doing the fourteen day European cruise.”

“That’s great. That’s like in three weeks. It sounds fun,” I said cheerfully.

“I hope we don’t get seasick.”

“You’ll be fine, Mom. Have a great time. I’ll talk to you again before the trip. Well…I better go. I’ll call you soon.”

“Okay sweetie. I’ll talk to you soon.”

“And Mom…thank you,” I said sincerely, needing to hear all her words of comfort, though she had no idea what was going on.

“Anytime. That’s what mothers are for.”

After the phone conversation, I felt somewhat better, so I did my laundry, cleaned the house, and took care of bills. Somehow I had to find strength, because one way or another, I had to go to work, and I would run into Max, unless he found a way to avoid me.

**

Dragging myself out of bed, I didn’t know how I got to work. Everything about the place seemed too big and too cold. Trying to act like there was nothing wrong, I smiled as often as I could. This only confirmed that I had been right all along…never get into relationships with people you work with, especially your boss’s son.

I checked my emails—it seemed like every minute—but there were still no emails, texts, or phone calls from Max. Curiosity got the best of me, so I tiptoed down the hall to his office. It seemed very obsessive of me, but I needed to at least explain to him what had happened, because the thought of him hating me produced acid in my stomach. Even if he didn’t want to work things out, I would be okay with it, as long as he knew the truth.

Seeing his secretary, I walked up to her. “Hi…umm…I was wondering if Mr. Knight was in his office?”

“Ms. Mefferd, he’s not in today.”

I knew I should stop asking questions, but I couldn’t help it. I didn’t know if I felt disappointed or relieved that I didn’t have to face him. For some reason, the dagger in my heart cut in deeper. “Do you know if he’ll be in today or tomorrow?”

“I’m not sure. He’s usually in the office by now, but I know he has several meetings out of the office this morning. Would you like for me to leave a message for you?”

“No,” I said quickly, then I thought, Why not? “I mean…sure. Can you please tell him I need to talk to him, and that it’s urgent?”

“Sure.” She started to scribble words on her pad.

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“Thanks.” I turned on my heel to walk away. My body felt heavy, and the clicking sound from my heels got louder as I headed back to my office.

**

From my office window, I could see the thick, heavy clouds. Their bellies were so full that they were ready to burst. As more dark clouds gathered, it got darker and colder. Then lightning flashed deadly, yet beautifully, across the sky, followed by a loud boom of angry thunder that shook the window. Rain pounded on the ground, washing away the dirt, washing away the smog. I wished it could wash away my pain, but of course I knew it was impossible.

After work, I went straight home. Becky had left for San Francisco that morning, so I was home alone. Luke had called me every day—sure…now he called me everyday—but I never picked up. And as for Max…well…he never replied at all. I chuckled out loud at the irony of this. The three of us were somehow connected and doing similar things. I was avoiding Luke, and Max was avoiding me. Luke wanted to get in touch with me, and I wanted to do the same with Max.

After eating last night’s leftovers, I took a shower and went to bed early. I didn’t know if the thoughts of Max were wearing me down or if I was coming down with something, but my body began to feel heavy and cold…very cold.

**

The next day, I went to work, looking and acting like a zombie. After some persuasion from Lisa, begging me to go home, I did. I had caught some kind of bug, and it was terrible. Without any dinner, I snuggled into the comfort of my bed as I thought of Max and went to sleep.

Shivering…sweating…my whole body burned. Kicking off my blankets, I reached for them when I suddenly got cold again. I wished my body would make up its mind, but it didn’t. Tossing and turning, I had a restless, uncomfortable night.

When I woke up, I didn’t feel any better, so I called in sick. Though I wasn’t hungry, I knew I needed something to eat, since I hadn’t eaten anything the previous night. Wanting to head to the kitchen, my feet dragged across the floor like they weighed a ton. After drinking a glass of water, I tried eating something, even a slice of bread, but I couldn’t take a bite of anything.

Looking into the medicine cabinet, I found some Advil, so I took it. Though I knew I should feel better, I didn’t. I felt myself burning up again, and it wasn’t from alcohol this time. All I wanted to do was sleep and close my eyes, because right now, even Max wasn’t on my mind…my burning throat and the feeling that a bus had hit me was. Forget Luke, forget Max…forget…I couldn’t think or feel anything anymore, except for the need for sleep, and my heart, which hammered against my ribs so fast I thought it would burst right through.

**

Something besides my head pounded as I drifted in and out of sleep. It sounded like it came from the kitchen, but I didn’t care. Nor did I have the energy or strength to get up and see where the sound had come from; either that, or I was clearly delusional from my current con***ion.

Feeling something cool touching me, I welcomed whatever was on my cheek. I let out a soft moan and shifted my head from side to side.

“Jenna.” I heard a male voice calling my name. “Are you okay? ****…she’s really hot.”

This must be a dream. I missed Max so much I was dreaming about him, but I didn’t mind. Hearing his voice somehow soothed the ache in my body. At least it gave me a temporary escape.

The cold hands left my face. “Nooo,” I moaned. Max was fading…come back.

“Should we call the ambulance?” another voice said. I didn’t want to hear him. Who was he?

“She’ll be fine. I had the same thing. I’ll take care of her. Thank you for letting me in,” Max replied.

Max wanted to take care of me. This was too good to be true; it was just a dream, but I would take it. Then the voices faded in and out.

“I’m not suppose to be doing this, but since her mail box was full…she didn’t pick up the phone, and since she works for you and she hasn’t returned your phone calls, it was something to be alarmed about. I’m glad I could help. She does look really sick,” the other voice said.

“Here’s my business card,” Max said.

“Wow! Are you the Mr. Knight from Knight Magazine?”

“Yes, but my father is the founder,” he said flatly.

“Why didn’t you tell me in the first place? Well, I’d better go now. I’m sure she’s in good hands.”

Then I heard the sound of retreating footsteps and cold hands on my face again. And my dream ended.

Chapter 23

Blinking my eyes open to the sun gave me the warmth that I needed to let me know I was going to be okay. Though there was a little lingering ache in my body, it was definitely much better. But one thing was for sure…I had lost several pounds. As I lay there trying to recall the dream I’d had about Max and some stranger, I couldn’t. It was gone, and the knot in my heart that was temporarily pushed aside came back fast and heavy.

Suddenly it dawned on me that I had no idea what day or time it was. I racked my brain trying to figure out how long I had been passed out. My cell phone would tell me the information I needed. I only had to reach over to my nightstand, but I needed to get up and use the restroom. Getting out of bed wasn’t as bad as I thought it would have been, but my legs were shaky, and my muscles were weak all over.

I had only taken a few steps when I heard a loud, female, screeching scream, and I immediately knew Becky was home. Wondering what that was all about, I opened the door and ran out of my room. Becky was standing by the front door. She looked shocked, like she had seen a ghost. I followed her line of vision and…. Oh my God! Max was standing there, holding up both of his hands, seemingly gesturing he was not a thief.

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Max wearing jeans and a black sweater made me think it was the weekend, but I knew Becky was returning on Thursday, so it had to be Thursday. What was Max doing there? I couldn’t recall any of it. I wondered when and how he had gotten in. Even in casual clothing he still looked hot…so good, it made my heart skip a beat. Looking a little bit younger and a little bit less serious, he looked like he hadn’t slept in days, nor shaved. They both stood there looking astonished until I broke their stare.

I cleared my throat. “Max…what are you doing here?” My voice was hoarse, but I said it as gently as I could. The hurt and anger in his eyes was still there. I wasn’t sure if he wanted to talk to me. God…I needed to talk to him, and fast. Seeing him like this was making me ache even worse.

Max’s gaze lowered to my T-shirt. I was wearing his white T-shirt and only a panty underneath, but I knew he could see my ni**les protruding out, so I crossed my arms. Since he didn’t ask for it back, I’d kept it. I didn’t know why, but needing to feel things would work out, I’d worn it to bed. I only hoped he didn’t think it belonged to Luke.

Since he was still staring and didn’t answer, Becky held a giant smile, walked toward him, and extended her hand. “Hello, Max. I’m so sorry about that. I’m Jenna’s roommate. I thought you were…gosh, I’m so sorry.”

He snapped out of whatever was on his mind, shook her hand, and then let go. “Becky, it’s nice to meet you. It’s okay. I would’ve screamed too if I saw a stranger in my apartment…but not like a woman, of course.” His tone was sweet and charming as usual.

Becky let out a giggle, and things got awkward after that. Max wouldn’t look at me. He didn’t even answer my question.

“Well….” His eyes went straight to the front door. “Now that you’re here and she’s in good hands, I’ll be on my way home. It looks like you just got back from somewhere…a business trip, perhaps?”

“Yes,” Becky replied, placing her bag down.

“You’re not leaving again, are you?”

“No, not for another month.”

Max nodded. “I didn’t pick the lock, if you’re wondering. Your landlord let me in. Jenna had called in sick for two days and her assistant, Lisa, needed to ask her an important question, and she never returned the phone call. I…we were worried. Several of us that got back from the New York trip called in sick too, including myself. I guess we caught the same nasty bug.”

I had been knocked out for two days? Max had been sick too, but he was here to take care of me?

Max continued. “Knowing she didn’t have her family nearby, it’s our policy to take care of our employees…just in case…you know what I mean. Anyway, I should go.”

“Thanks for taking care of her.” Becky looked grateful and awed.

Max nodded with a small grin. “I’ve left a bottle of antibiotics the doctor left for her. Oh…I had my doctor friend come check on her. I hope that was okay?”

Becky’s eyes grew wide and she nodded with admiration. “Sure…of course. Thank you.”

“I had to crush the pills so she could sip it, but I think she’s okay to swallow pills now. Please make sure she finishes the remaining three. Since the dosage is high, she needs to make sure she takes it on a full stomach.”

Why was he taking to Becky as if I wasn’t there? Did he hate me that much? He’d crushed my pills? Now this was too much. I hated myself for hurting him. Anxiety was taking over my body as I fidgeted. I needed to explain to him right now.

Max still hadn’t looked my way after he turned from me. After Becky thanked him again, he headed straight for the door. I froze…I completely froze. My heart pounded in my chest and burned from the possible rejection. He said I was stubborn…he was worse than me. Shaking on my legs that were too weak to move, Becky looked at me with a “what the hell are you still standing there for” look. She was right.

“Max,” I breathed his name, but it came out too soft, and maybe it hurt too much to say it; I didn’t know which one it was. But I was sure he heard my stomping steps, which was the reason he turned around. Just as I almost reached him, my weak legs gave out. I almost stumbled onto the floor, but Max caught my fall with one arm, as if holding me with two arms would be terrible.

“Why are you running in your con***ion?” he scolded.

I didn’t answer. My body in his arms, tightly against the side of his chest, overwhelmed me and made that tingling feeling come alive again. Staring at his chest, I couldn’t look up, especially when his hand wrung my T-shirt tightly. Either he was mad or he was fighting something. I couldn’t tell, but I wished I knew. “Max…please. I need to talk to you. It’s not what you think.”

My eyes became watery. No, I won’t cry in front of him. It will make me look pathetic. This wasn’t working. When he didn’t answer me, I slowly craned my neck upward, passing his ***y Adam’s apple and his stubble along his jaws that I wanted to touch so badly.

His eyes gazed on mine without even blinking.

“Please…I tried to call and text, but you wouldn’t answer.” That sounded like I was begging, but at this point I didn’t care. He was going to leave with that look in his eyes, and I couldn’t handle it.

“I know,” he whispered. Releasing a deep sigh, his eyes gazed lower.

Was that all he had to say to me after he had wanted to be with me? There was that dagger in my heart again, twisting. One tear found its way down my cheek.

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He closed his eyes as soon as he spotted it and inhaled a deep breath.

“You can hate me all you want, but let me explain. At least give me that.” My lips quivered.

He flashed his eyes open as if my words surprised him. With his free hand, he wiped my tears. “Don’t cry. You know I can’t stand to see you cry.”

Don’t let me, and do something about it, I wanted to yell at him.

“Not here. Not now. I don’t want to talk to you here with your roommate, and I don’t want to talk to you in a restaurant. I’ll text you my address. I’ll let you know what time. Don’t go to work tomorrow…I’ve already called in sick for you. You should be a lot better by Sunday. We’ll talk then.”

I nodded as he shifted me to steady my stand. “You okay to stand?” His eyes went straight to my br**sts.

If I had covered them with my arms at that minute, he would know I knew he was looking…awkward…but I couldn’t help the thought of his hands on them. Trying to make this as smooth as possible, I ran my hand through my hair and crossed my arms. He shuddered slightly, and I didn’t know what to think of that.

Max blinked. “I better go. Don’t forget to take your medicine, and eat something before you do, or your stomach will let you know you forgot.”

I reached over and opened the door. “Max…thank you for being here. I’ll pay for the doctor’s bill and the medicine, and whatever that—”

He didn’t let me finish. “See you on Sunday,” he said wearily, then walked out the door.

Trying not to make it obvious, though it may have seem a bit stalkish, I stuck out my head just enough to see him walk down the hallway and enter the elevator.

Chapter 24

Sunday couldn’t come fast enough. The past night had been another rough night’s sleep compared to the other rough nights’ sleep the days before. Max had been there on Thursday, so I had to wait three days before I got to tell him my side of the story. I was feeling a whole lot better, and I had to thank Max for that.

My mind was blown away by the fact that he cared enough to come to my rescue. Though he had mentioned that it was his company policy, I wasn’t too stupid to realize that he was worried about me, and this gave me hope that things could work out. I hadn’t known Lisa was trying to reach me, but then again, I didn’t recall the phone ringing, and my cell phone was on silent mode…it had also ran out of battery power.

Becky had a lunch date. She told me we would exchange stories that night, and she would give me more details about the possible new man in her life. I couldn’t wait to hear all about him. As I stared for God knows how long, I glanced at my closet full of clothes and saw nothing worth wearing. How was that possible? Becky and I had gone shopping recently. Needing to get to Max’s house, I decided to wear a pair of jeans and a red button-up sweater.

After slipping on my coat and a pair of boots, I was on my way. Max didn’t live far from work. I had expected to be looking for a house, but instead I found myself standing in front of a tall building. He lived in a pent house. Nervously, I headed up the elevator as my finger found its way to my mouth. I didn’t realize how hard I was biting until I pulled it out from the pain. It was a very bad habit I needed to break.

Standing in front of Max’s door, I inhaled deeply and rang the white circular button on my left. After a long few seconds, the door cracked open and anxiety flooded through me. Exhaling and inhaling quick breaths, I wanted to pass out. Most of the anxiety went away when I saw that gorgeous smile on his face. At least it was genuine this time, like he was happy to see me.

“Hi, Jenna. You look….” He paused. “You look better. Come in.”

Max was wearing cotton shorts and a plain white T-shirt, just like the one I’d borrowed… kept…and he was barefoot. He still hadn’t shaved, which made him look even ***ier. I had to find a way to stop staring. Trying not to glance around was almost impossible. After Max took my coat, I took in the breathtaking view from his window, which took up the entire back wall.

The city lights dazzled against the black sky. A multitude of colors shined like Christmas lights, holding their vibrant hues. As my boots clicked away on the dark wood floor, I followed him to the living room. The furnishings were simple but elegant, and I approved of his taste. His place was big, spacious, open, and wide. You could even see the kitchen from the living room.

“Sit anywhere you like,” he said.

Already standing next to the sofa, I just plopped myself down to the nice, expensive, leather spot.

“Would you like anything to drink?” he asked, pouring himself some liquor into a wine glass. “Some water or juice perhaps?”

He had only given me two options since he already knew my lack of alcohol tolerance. “No, thank you,” I replied. I didn’t want to be there longer than I needed to be. The longer I stayed, the stronger the likelihood of me not wanting to leave.

“So….” He cleared his throat after taking a sip of his drink. “What did you need to talk to me about? You made it clear before that we shouldn’t date, and you made it clear by being with him that night. From the way I’ve been behaving, I have to say you were right. We shouldn’t be dating.”

His words pierced through my heart with a sharp sting. Looking down, I nodded. I needed to be brave. This was more difficult than I had thought it would be. It would have been easier to express myself when it had happened, but to say all that I felt a week later, not to mention being really sick, and to hear him say we shouldn’t be dating, was extremely difficult. Then I knew I had lost my chance.

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Placing my purse down next to me, I rubbed the palms of my hands on my jeans and focused on my hands. It was easier to talk to my hands than to look into his eyes. “I needed to tell you…that night… what you saw wasn’t what you thought you saw.” I paused. “He…I called him so that I could end things with him. We went out to dinner so I could tell him, then he brought me back home. I told him goodbye and that’s…that’s when he kissed me. I was completely shocked, and was not expecting that at all. I tried to push him away, but he was too strong.”

Max’s body tensed and his hands balled up tightly. “Did he hurt you?”

“No…yes…I mean…he hurt me in the sense that I didn’t give him my permission, and he wouldn’t let go. I didn’t have an option. He was holding on so…tight. I was trying so hard to push him away…but….”

Max’s shoulders relaxed, and something had changed in the way he looked at me. I wasn’t sure if it was for the better or worse. Standing up, he headed for the window. “If what you are telling me is true, then I was the fool not to let you explain it to me. But you have to understand…I’d wanted to take you out since the first time I saw you at the restaurant. I remember seeing you there with Becky. After all the no’s and the reasons why we couldn’t go out, you’d finally said yes, and made me the happiest man in the universe.

“I was suppose to be in New York that weekend, but now I wished I hadn’t cancelled just *****rprise you. I didn’t want to wait another week to see you, so I rescheduled for this week…which I rescheduled again because I found out you were sick. And when you didn’t call Lisa back, she let me know. I was very worried. I didn’t mean to step over the line, but I just needed to know you were okay, especially more so when you weren’t answering your phone. I didn’t want to leave you a text message. I needed to see for myself.

“Going back to that night, the only thing I saw was…that…Puke….” He had the most disgusted look on his face. I wanted to laugh so hard, but I didn’t want to correct him. Knowing he knew Luke’s name and called him “Puke” was hilarious and cute. Max continued. “…Kissing you like there was no tomorrow, and the fact that I told you I was going to be out of town….” He stopped pacing and surprisingly sat on the floor in front of me. Taking my hand, he gently caressed the back of it, seemingly apologizing through his gesture. “But…I’m so sorry. I didn’t let you explain, and I don’t mean to go all possessive on you like that…it’s just that…I’ve never felt like this with anyone before.”

When Max’s hand cupped my left cheek, I let out a soft sigh and shuddered, and I tried so hard not to lean into his hand. “I was really hurt,” Max continued, placing his hand back to mine. “We haven’t even gone out, and how you could make me feel this way…I don’t understand. You have this hold on me that’s exciting and terrifying at the same time. But if I held onto my fears, then I would never have taken the leap, but I did. I wanted to dive right into your heart and permanently stay there. I fell for you the first time I looked into your eyes. That’s all it took. Then I knew I’d found the one I’ve been waiting for all my life.”

I wanted to say that I felt the same, but the words wouldn’t come out. My lips were sealed shut as I listened, because for the last eight days I’d felt like I was in hell because of him, and like he said, we hadn’t even dated. Was this wrong? I only went there to explain so he wouldn’t hate me…that’s it. But hearing his words confused me. After that night, I was thinking of trying to find another job.

When my free hand went straight to my mouth, Max pulled it away. “Don’t do that, Jenna. You have no idea what that does to me.” Then Max pushed his way between my legs, reaching closer…oh please don’t! His hands cupped my face. “I’m sorry for being…a jerk. Let’s start over again. Hello…I’m Max, and I really want to get to know you and take you out.” His brows twitched playfully, looking so adorable.

My eyes grew wide, trying to hide my smile, but it curled up enough for Max to see it. I hadn’t expected that at all. He already “had me at hello,” but I had to talk some sense for the both of us. We weren’t thinking clearly about all of this at all. “Max…after what we’ve both been through, I think we…ummm….” He felt what I was going to say, so he placed his hand straight down with that funny look in his eyes. “Like you said before, we work together, and if things don’t work out, then…it would be really difficult…and I think...like you had indicated, it wouldn’t be good for—”

“It’s too late, Jenna,” he said softly, placing his hands on my arms. “I only said that not knowing what you would be saying to me. I know you feel something. I can see it in your eyes…the way you respond when I’m close to you. And because I know this, there is nothing that I wouldn’t do to convince you now. I’m not letting you slip through my fingers again.”

Somehow I was standing. How did he get me to stand without me even knowing? Darn his eyes, that made me get lost in them. “Look what we’ve been through, and we haven’t even gone out,” I said.

“I don’t know, Jenna. I’ve only told you what I’ve been through.” His eyes widened and glowed, and those lips of his curled up wickedly. “Tell me…did you feel the same way as me when I didn’t text or call back? Did you miss me as much as I missed you?”