Joke of the Day!

One day a guy whom has winking problem with his eyes came to an ophthalmologist.
_?oDoctor, doctor. Help me! I don?Tt know why my eyes always wink, and I can?Tt control them. Can you please help me to cure this problem??
The doctor wondered: ?oAre you feeling uncomfortable, or hurt with your eyes??
_?oNo, actually not, doctor. But every time I went to the pharmacy store, the ladies in the store often gave me a lovely wink back, and then handed me a condom!


Wink: Nháy mắt.
Ophthalmologist: Bác sĩ nhãn khoa
Pharmacy store: Nhà thuốc
Condom: Bao cao su

- Mummy, does God use our bathroom ?
- No darling, why do you ask?
- Well, every morning Daddy bangs on the door and shouts â?oOh God, are you still in there?â?
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Judge: Iâ?Tve decided to give you a suspended sentence.
Prisoner: Thank you, your honour
Judge: What for? Youâ?Tre going to be hanged.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
- Why are you scratching yourself Mary ?
- Nobody else knows where I itch !

Nothing Impossible

- Mummy, does God use our bathroom ?
- No darling, why do you ask?
- Well, every morning Daddy bangs on the door and shouts â?oOh God, are you still in there?â??
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Judge: Iâ?Tve decided to give you a suspended sentence.
Prisoner: Thank you, your honour
Judge: What for? Youâ?Tre going to be hanged.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
- Why are you scratching yourself Mary ?
- Nobody else knows where I itch !

Nothing Impossible

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Boy: (Howling) A crab just bit my toe .
Father: Which one?
Boy: How do I know ? all crabs look alike to me
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Boss (to department head): How many people work in your office?
Dept. Head: About half of them, sir !
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Doctor: Good morning, Mrs Potter. I havenâ?Tt seen you for a long time .
Mrs Potter: I know Doctor. Iâ?Tve been ill.

Nothing Impossible

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Boy: (Howling) A crab just bit my toe .
Father: Which one?
Boy: How do I know ? all crabs look alike to me
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Boss (to department head): How many people work in your office?
Dept. Head: About half of them, sir !
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Doctor: Good morning, Mrs Potter. I havenâ?Tt seen you for a long time .
Mrs Potter: I know Doctor. Iâ?Tve been ill.

Nothing Impossible

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Reggie: Wê?Tve got a new dog ?" would you like to come round and play with him?
Ron: Well, he sounds very fierce ?" does he bite ?
Reggie: That?Ts what I want to find out
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Barney: I?Tve owned this car for fifteen years and never had a wreck.
Prospective Buyer : You mean you?Tve owned this wreck for fifteen years and never had a car.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Mr Brown: I haven?Tt seen your dog lately.
Mr Green: No I had it put down
Mr Brown: Was it mad?
Mr Green: Well, it wasn?Tt exactly pleased.

Nothing Impossible

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Reggie: Wê?Tve got a new dog ??" would you like to come round and play with him?
Ron: Well, he sounds very fierce ??" does he bite ?
Reggie: That??Ts what I want to find out
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Barney: I??Tve owned this car for fifteen years and never had a wreck.
Prospective Buyer : You mean you??Tve owned this wreck for fifteen years and never had a car.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Mr Brown: I haven??Tt seen your dog lately.
Mr Green: No I had it put down
Mr Brown: Was it mad?
Mr Green: Well, it wasn??Tt exactly pleased.

Nothing Impossible

While visiting his friends in County Mayo, Paddy was dismayed when a torrential storm developed. His friend Rory said "you must stay the night with us - you can't go home in this storm." "Thanks very much", said Paddy, " I'll just pop home and get me pyjamas"
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Susan: Did Magaret inherit her beauty?
Jean: Yes, her father left her a chemist's shop.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Mother: Why are you keeping this box of earth, Willy ?
Willy: It's instant mud-pie mix.

Nothing Impossible

While visiting his friends in County Mayo, Paddy was dismayed when a torrential storm developed. His friend Rory said "you must stay the night with us - you can't go home in this storm." "Thanks very much", said Paddy, " I'll just pop home and get me pyjamas"
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Susan: Did Magaret inherit her beauty?
Jean: Yes, her father left her a chemist's shop.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Mother: Why are you keeping this box of earth, Willy ?
Willy: It's instant mud-pie mix.

Nothing Impossible

Waiter : How did you find your chop sir?
Diner: I looked under a chop, and there it was.
------------------------------------------------------------
Insurance agent: This is a particularly good policy, madam. Under it, we pay up to a thousand pounds for broken arms and legs.
Woman : Good heavens - what do you do with them all?
-----------------------------------------------------------
Mother : Bobby's teacher says he ought to have an encyclopedia.
Father: Let him walk to school like I had to !

Nothing Impossible