1. Tuyển Mod quản lý diễn đàn. Các thành viên xem chi tiết tại đây

Nhật ký

Chủ đề trong '7X Đà Nẵng' bởi saobien_12, 14/03/2006.

  1. 1 người đang xem box này (Thành viên: 0, Khách: 1)
  1. emilydang

    emilydang Thành viên mới

    Tham gia ngày:
    24/01/2006
    Bài viết:
    423
    Đã được thích:
    0
    Má ơi, giải quyết sao đây trời? Mình quyết định đổi đại lý giờ khó nói với thằng đại lý đang làm quá. Nói sao cho nó hiểu mà không làm sứt mẻ quan hệ chứ? Mấy thằng Trung Quốc nó nóng như lửa ấy. Mình sẽ đi học Tiếng Tàu để nói với tụi nó cho dễ.
    Sếp bảo share thị phần. Nghe ban đầu có vẻ hợp lý nhưng cũng chưa chắc. Quan trọng là cách diễn đạt sao cho nhẹ nhàng không làm cho nó nổi sung lên. Mình nghĩ linh tinh mà chẳng nghĩ cái chính gì cả. Bắt đầu suy nghĩ từ đâu nhỉ? Đặt vào vị trí nó thử xem: tao đã giúp mày handle hàng giờ mày muốn đá tao hả? Cùng ở Thượng Hải mà mày sd 2 đại lý hả? Mày giải thích tao coi lý do mày bỏ tao trong khi tao đã nhiệt tình với mày thế?
    Ôi má ơi, nếu làm việc với thằng D. thì mình không còn kiểm soát trực tiếp nữa nhưng nó sẽ quản lý hàng chặt, đỡ cho mình hơn. Suốt ngày nghe KH nheo nhéo bên tai, đếch chịu được. Từ giờ tới chiều phải nghĩ cho ra nghe Emily.
  2. victory_or_death

    victory_or_death Thành viên mới

    Tham gia ngày:
    13/04/2004
    Bài viết:
    937
    Đã được thích:
    0
    Tò mò một chút bạn đang công tác ở công ty nào thế...Chúc Emily sớm tìm ra giải pháp tốt nhất... vui vẻ hạnh phúc
  3. victory_or_death

    victory_or_death Thành viên mới

    Tham gia ngày:
    13/04/2004
    Bài viết:
    937
    Đã được thích:
    0
    Ui mình vô duyên quá vào nhầm chỗ mất rồi.. Hai đứa đang tán nhau trong room này .... Xin cáo lỗi... Hai đứa cứ tự nhiên đi nhé... A mà này làm thơ ác chiến nhỉ... Thơ mới của nền văn học việt nam đấy
  4. saobien_12

    saobien_12 Thành viên rất tích cực

    Tham gia ngày:
    08/08/2005
    Bài viết:
    2.918
    Đã được thích:
    0
    Mô phật.Cây muốn lặng mà gió chẵng chịu ngừng...
    hic hic anh victory_or_death cứ tự nhiên đi .... hic hic ...
  5. saobien_12

    saobien_12 Thành viên rất tích cực

    Tham gia ngày:
    08/08/2005
    Bài viết:
    2.918
    Đã được thích:
    0
    I fell my heart is going to be colder !!

    My friend, M.T, after a long time away from home, spins me a long yarn:

    All my life I only love one woman. We have had almost 8 years in love. Love is so sweet and colorful, and I was so happy ... I was the happiest man! To tell the truth, I am what I am today is all thanks to her. Getting close to her I felt more confident and stronger on the way of my life.

    I was a young man with my black file of politics when they (government) departed me from country X, deprived of my right to study, only because I would like an equal political systemõ?Ư****. Then I decided to get married to a girl whom I talked with after 3 minutesõ?ƯFunny, but it was the truth. I was too shocked at that moment and tried to talk with herõ?Ưand, she was the only person who calmed me down õ?o why donõ?Tt you think about going back to university and make it againõ?. No one, even my family talked to me this; perhaps, they wouldnõ?Tt want to make me more hurt when reminding me for another study. Her words were like a light to show me what I should do to get out of my trouble. Thatõ?Ts why I decided to marry herõ?Ưjust in a 3 minutes talking. She was my need at that time.

    But, I loved her, the girl I met after 3 years marrying, when I went back to university. At first sight I felt as if she had been my girlfriend for long time! Her beauty, her gesture, her voice and the way she looked at me õ?" all made me mad about her. I started separating my wife to move closer her.

    T lowers his voice as if he was whispering himself: õ?oShe never betrays meõ?ƯShe is not that kind of womanõ?;

    His voiced suddenly changes bitterly: õ?oShe said she got married only because she loves me so much õ?" it is her principle. She, more than one, said to me that we must abandon because we loved each other, and because she loved me so much that she would not want to hurt me.õ?

    õ?oYes, I accepted this principle; I did it because I loved her. I wanted to make her happy, to make her think that she was an angel and I respected her ideas. But, whenever I think of her, I feel so angry. Whenever I tried to remember her; her beauty, her voice, her gestures, her doleful eyesõ?Ư and, the way she looked at me; whenever I just catch one of these õ?" those things made me crazy loving her, I could not enjoy with them, instead, I want to shout out õ?o I love you but I hate you, the untruthful womanõ?.õ?

    õ?o How did you meet her?õ? I try to calm T down.

    Oh, I met her in our class. That was my first week after I spent 3 years waiting for a permit to restudy at university. She looked as if she had just recovered from sick. -Pale, tired but her eyes were sparkling when she looked at something. Her hair streams over her shoulders and her face made me imagine that I was in front of Saint Maria Mother. Her eyes look a bit doleful but so sweet. I was very impressive with a picture of Saint Maria, who with her son Jesus on her arms, looks far away with her doleful eyes.

    õ?oCan you imagine if a pretty girl leaning her head on the doors looked at you with her Mariaõ?Ts eyes and smiled with you with her tired but so beautiful face?õ? T asked me. Perhaps, he did not believe I could imagine how beautiful she was. I wanted to say something to make him believe it, but he continued:

    We felt in love after that. No one in our class knew our secrete relationship. They thought that we were just only close friendsõ?Ưeven some guys tried to make friend with me with a hope that they could get closer to herõ?Ư We were laughing when I told her their intentions. I was so happy that moment õ?" she was a dream of many guys, but she was mine already!

    I didnõ?Tt know why she loved me; the only thing I could realize that I was a limelight in our class-no formal uniform like the other guysõ?T; always with jeans and T shirts and ready for any argument with the teachers-all of these made me strange from the others... and, made me an attraction of girls, perhaps.

    Every weekend, I was deceiving my wife that I had to study in library and went with her to a small hotel outside the city. We chose the hotel because we didnõ?Tt want anyone to see us. It was beautiful and quiet place. From our southern small window No -TV room with the only clean bed and an old table, we could see the rice field and enjoy cool wind coming from the field. We spent the whole day togetherõ?Ưgoing out, eating, and doing everything we could do to compensate the school days we had to keep secretõ?Ư

    Suddenly, T stopped talking and looked at me: õ?o why donõ?Tt you ask me if I was her first man?õ? õ?o Werenõ?Tt you?õ? I tried to avoid explaining much.

    õ?o Yes, at least she said thatõ?, T continued:

    I asked her this question after first time we were together when I saw her with confidence doing that. I was nervous because I thought that I might insult her anyway. But she seemed not care about it; she amused me õ?o you should read more about this, then you knowõ?. To tell the truth I didnõ?Tt care much about it. It was not important for me, a man going back from Europe õ?" that I loved her was enough. However, she said that I was.

    My wife started suspecting of my strange habits at the weekends. She tried to find out what happened to me with those daysõ?Ư but she just knew that I did not love her as she expected. She asked me to go shopping with her, I refused; she asked me with her to visit some our friends, I refused; even she asked me to help her take care of my son, I shouted angrily that it was not my job. õ?o Whatõ?Ts the hell going on with you?õ? she could not stand anymore. õ?o do you have someone else?õ?. I kept silence and kept going out. She asked me to divorce but I hesitated to do it because I need a clear reason to talk with my parents. They were extremely tra***ionally conservative. We began a separate life although we still lived together.

    T looked for another cup of coffee while asking me if I could guess what his girlõ?Ts idea about his divorce. His voiced now changes disappointedly:

    My dear girl never agreed with me that I should get divorced. She often said she could not stand if she robbed some oneõ?Ts happiness. She tried to convince me to keep our marriage. I could not understand herõ?Ư Why I should not divorce; why I could not marry her? The only answer was myself answer: She wanted to show me her virtue that she was not a girl who stole love; that, she loved me with her heartõ?Ưthat õ?olove is loveõ?. I expected: õ?o at last moment, she will agree to marry meõ?.

    We never talked about marrying again until on our graduation day, when she was coming with an old man. I was reluctant to meet him because he was not my favorite style. I thought he must be her uncle. Short, fat and his clothes-all looked like a farmer just came out of the village. She introduced: õ?o This is my boyfriendõ? õ?Ư õ?oWhat?õ? õ?o your boyfriend?õ? I could not keep my monthõ?Ưõ? are you kidding? Heõ?Ts your boyfriend?õ? I could not say anything more because I would make our class know everything about our guilty story... I was shocked and insisted her not to do it. She should wait me for a while after I got divorced. She shook her head õ?o No, I donõ?Tt like that; I would love to have a family with a man who is still in freedom. He is the man I chose. He is a manager of a big companyõ?Ts department; he can make my life easier õ?. No way, I agreed with her thoughtõ?Ư I loved her and respected her. I said õ?o I am waiting you until you are not satisfied with your marriageõ?. õ?o Thank you, T,õ? She said õ?o you are always the man who understand meõ?.

    I was so sad at that time and I tried to get out of it by working far from homeõ?ƯIt took me 4 months to calm down to go back to my home city.

    She came to me and said that she could not be happy with the man she had chosen; He asked her to get married before helping her to work in his company. She was offended; She could not stand it because she was aware of her beauty, which could be a weapon to control men; She didnõ?Tt like to be controlled. I looked at her, my eyes were full of tears, so did sheõ?Ư I was so happy to realize that she loved me and could not leave me anymore.

    Whispering into my earsõ? I love you and I never leave you againõ?, she asked me for a wedding. It was embarrassing moment because I did not prepare for the answer. I just swore that I would do it, anyway. We tried to be serious to swear in front of the candleõ?Ts light; we did not have any witness in that small cabin designed only enough for a couple sitting with their coffees. We declared that from that moment we were husband and wife and she only could get married if we got divorced at the same place õ?" The same place and the same light, which witnessed our announcement.

    However, whenever I planed to divorce, she tried to interrupt meõ?Ư She said that she could not break the other family to build her family. She seemed not remember what we had said each other that night. I was a faint man, as my mother said, so I kept obeying her to live with my wife, while going out with her at the weekends, every weekend.

    I knew that she was not serious with our words that night. For her, it was something like õ?osaying for sayingõ?õ?ƯI worried that she would leave me again so that I tried to make my own plan: I would go abroad to study and asked her go with me. We would find somewhere in Europe to live together without thinking of any problems. I told her the plan and convinced her to do it. She was impressive with my plan. By saying that she would do her best to follow me, she encouraged me to go first; then, she would.

    I had no choice because my study was arranged and I would like to show her my strong aspiration, anyway. I left my home, hoped to see her in my second year studying in the country where I would study.

    Every day, since I left, she wrote to me. She promised she would come soon. She encouraged me to study, asked my account number in order to send me money. She wasnõ?Tt rich; so did her family, but I knew that she would do it if I gave her my number. I didnõ?Tt do it. I knew she asked me that with all her heart and love; She loved me, at least. So, I could hope in her.

    Time was flying and I got very good results for my first year at the university. However, I started getting a butter fly in my stomach when thinking of my planõ?Ư one year was almost passed but she did not talk any of it. For more than one week she didnõ?Tt answer my emailõ?ƯI guessed that she would be sick, so I decided to call her. She did not answer for hundreds of calls I made. She called me back the next day while I was too nervous and worried about her.

    õ?o T, I am so sorry for not taking your phoneõ? she said õ?o But I could not go with you; I need a stable family and think of my familyõ?. What? Why? I screamed out. I was shocked againõ?Ư my plan seemed to be broken down in a secondõ?Ư I wandered in our university, did not know where I would go. I could not realize if I cried or not because it was raining heavily and my mind was totally empty. She sent me an email to apologize and told me about the man she would marry. She said he was 14 years older than her but a successful man with his own company. He was a good man and could understand her well; he knew what she needed and would make her happy. She was so proud of herself when telling that his family was so happy seeing her as a daughter-in-law. And, of course õ?o he is better looking than the first one,õ? she said. She was honest; she needed that kind of husband õ?" not me; She could be happy with this manõ?ƯHe must be kind to her. I started to accept it. I knew that she would face so many difficulties if she went with me.

    I had studied hard to finish my last year. That was the only motivation I had to compensate my love. I didnõ?Tt receive any information about her for at least six moths. But, she called me again. She cried and I cried either when she said that I was the only man who understood and loved herõ?Ưthat, she would never marry to the good man she chose; He did not allow her to go out with her friends; even for watching a football match. When she hid him to go with someone, he accused her of betraying immediately. She would like to see me and she waited to see me againõ?Ư

    I promised her to come back just after I got the results of my exams. I thought that it should be the last time for her to choose a rich husband. She should learn much from her failures. So, I went back one month after that.

    To be sure that she did leave the man, I called her after some days arrived home. I did not like to have any trouble with anyone while I had to come back to finish my study. She swore that she left him already and she was free, anyway. She would like to see me.

    Two months at home was my happiest time. I loved her more even I could not find anything left from her as the last time I met her. She looked so different; her clothes, her gestures, her voice and even her face were much different than two years before. The way she dressed now looked like she was a movie star. Her smooth hair now changed into a curly one; it made her like a woman than a single girl. Her voice was not as sweet as I usually heard. Instead, it was the same as my wifeõ?Ts voice when she ordered me to do something: õ?o You must goõ? õ?o Do itõ? or õ?o Why not? Are you crazy?õ? these made her look older than I expected, and much older than her age. But, I felt loved her much more than ever. I was certainly sure that she would never leave me again.

    Two months was just like one day for me; She spent most of her time getting together, going out, being with me in the small hotel outside the cityõ?ƯI never thought she hid me anythingõ?ƯIt was my happiest time of my life.

    I must come back for my study. In a very sensitive moment, I asked her that if she wanted me to stay at home, then I would do that. Shaking head, she said that I must go because of our future life. She would do her best to help me and to go with me. She promised she would wait for me, foreverõ?Ư

    Once again, I left home with full of hopes. The last time when I saw her, she still told me that she would go with me. I was happy about it. I would do everything to prepare for a new life. Whenever I thought of she would have my baby, I felt as if my blood was streaming in her bodyõ?Ư


    õ?oDid she go with you after that?õ? I ask him, being impatient to know what happened next. T didnõ?Tt reply; just continued with his enduring voice:

    One month since we said õ?o good byeõ?, I was very excited to make my plan become realistic. I told her everything about the plan; I tried to make her believe that we would success. She seemed happy; but she did not reply me regularly as she did during the first month. I thought: perhaps she was busy as she said õ?" she had just had a project and she spent all her efforts doing it. I wrote to her, encouraged her to do her jobõ?Ưjust wanted to show her that I loved her and respected her.

    Her friend once met me on the phone. She asked me if I would finish my study before the M.Cõ?Ts wedding: õ?oWhat?õ? I roared up as if I was a wounded lion. I could not believe in my ears... õ?o Do you know M.C will get married next month?õ? She asked me again. õ?oItõ?Ts funny! I am not stupid... I have my head! Donõ?Tt fool me!õ? I really did not believe what the friend saidõ?Ư She was the only person who knew about our love; õ?oShe liked me and she was jealousõ? I thought. I decided to call her to tell her about that funny story. This time she picked up my phone immediately õ?o Hey, baby! You know what I will tell you?õ? õ?o Itõ?Ts very funny story Iõ?Tve ever heardõ?ƯI think you must be crazy because of laughingõ? I was so exited to tell her about this with a bit proud of myself because she knew that the girl who talked with me also liked me during the school. She did not say anything until I asked her again that how funny she felt. õ?o Iõ?Tm sorry, T; it is trueõ?Ư I need a family, and I need to think of my familyõ?. I shivered, stuttering tragically: õ?oW..h..at? Wh..y? Ho..w?õ?. Again, a need of family, and a responsibility of her family were her reasons for swallowing her words.

    I hurried going back home. I really wanted to know what happened to herõ?Ư I hoped that the wedding was faked and she would tell me that only because she would like to see meõ?Ư I hoped.

    I decided not to tell her that I was at home. I wanted to see exactly what happened. I followed her and tried to find out the truth. She didnõ?Tt know my existenceõ?ƯShe seemed to be in her happiness with the man whom I guessed would marry her. Two days tracing her I saw her as the first time I met herõ?Ư Her voice, her gestures and the way she looked at the man were exactly what I she did with meõ?Ư And, they were in our favorite bar that we agreed that only us should go even if we broke up. More than one, I wanted to rush forward where they were sitting in order to reveal her faceõ?Ư But, I could not do itõ?ƯI always felt hurt when I saw her facing the failuresõ?Ư I loved her; I could not do itõ?Ư anyway. õ?o I am a faint manõ?.

    I sat in a corner of the bar, looking at their backs; so she could not see me. I was too shocked for what I was seeingõ?ƯShe was back to what she was but to another man õ?Ư not me, the man she said she loved foreverõ?Ư

    I wanted to go home, but I didnõ?Tt know how I could leave the bar õ?Ư It was hard; I didnõ?Tt want her to catch me like a thief. Suddenly, her partner stood up and towards the rest roomõ?Ư I was so curious to see his face; so, I followed him. When I entered the room, he was startledõ?ƯHe, with his wallet in his hands, counting. He frightened looking at me as if I was a robber. Unexpectedly, I smiled õ?o Donõ?Tt worry; Iõ?Tm not a robber, even with your love; enjoy it!õ?. Sure, he didnõ?Tt know who I was; went out with his majestic walk towards her.
  6. saobien_12

    saobien_12 Thành viên rất tích cực

    Tham gia ngày:
    08/08/2005
    Bài viết:
    2.918
    Đã được thích:
    0
    Now I had reason to leave the bar without thinking of herõ?ƯI donõ?Tt know if she saw me or notõ?Ưwhat I imagined was that they were playing a fishing game. Each of them was the fish for the other. Each of them tried to catch the fish. Whenever they got caught, they thought they caught the fish. What the good fishing persons!
    õ?oDo you still love herõ?? I asked T when he stopped to smokeõ?ƯI was surprised because he never smoked before.
    T said with his lower voice: õ?oI hate her but I love herõ?Ư I cannot forget her; she got married last week and I am here to tell you that I never forget that untruthful woman. I will call her tomorrow to tell her that I will wait for her until she get divorcedõ?ƯI know that it would be happened and I am waiting for that. What an untruthful woman!õ?.
    õ?o Ohõ? T hastened õ?o I got to go now; I need to call her; I cannot wait till tomorrowõ?. He shook my hand and got out of the bar. His face looked much better. I just stayed alone, wondering if I were in his fateõ?Ư
    õ?o Will he call her now? õ?o Do you think he will do it?õ?, a voice from the next table waked me up. I turned around to see the girl who interrupted my thinking. õ?o What?õ? I am nearly leaped up to the table õ?" a girl with her hair streams over her shoulders, a sweet voice and her eyes looked at me as if I saw her in the Saint Maria pictureõ?Ư She smiled õ?o Do you believe that?õ? õ?o No, I donõ?Ttõ?, I wildered, thinking of my wife waiting me at home. õ?o No, I know this man; He wonõ?Tt do it; he needs to clear his mind onlyõ?. I left the bar, avoiding talking with her, the girl with her Mariaõ?Ts eyesõ?Ưmy son just called me for dinner.
    I know that T will never callõ?o the untruthful womanõ? õ?Ư He was a strong man and he will be back. Life is a game; we may lose or may win! If we accept to lose, we may win or we will not regret. And, the fact is that we need to accept the law of the game. I believe that my friend, T, knows this rule very well. He is not a boy; heõ?Ts a man!
    I donõ?Tt think he will keep calling her as õ?o the untruthful womanõ?. If he loves her, he wonõ?Tt do it. She deserves to have more our appreciation than the furiousness
  7. saobien_12

    saobien_12 Thành viên rất tích cực

    Tham gia ngày:
    08/08/2005
    Bài viết:
    2.918
    Đã được thích:
    0
    Cũng có lẽ bởi trái tim anh yêu nhiều quá ... anh hào hoa và lãng mạng quá .... để một ngày chợt thốt lên rằng I fell my heart is going to be colder ....
  8. victory_or_death

    victory_or_death Thành viên mới

    Tham gia ngày:
    13/04/2004
    Bài viết:
    937
    Đã được thích:
    0
    Cũng có lẽ bởi trái tim anh yêu nhiều quá ... anh hào hoa và lãng mạng quá .... để một ngày chợt thốt lên rằng I fell my heart is going to be colder ....
    Anh cũng như thế saobien oi....
  9. victory_or_death

    victory_or_death Thành viên mới

    Tham gia ngày:
    13/04/2004
    Bài viết:
    937
    Đã được thích:
    0
    "the untruthful woman" .... Đúng đúng đúng phải gọi người anh yêu như thế.... Và bây giờ anh là kẻ đơn độc.... unlove
  10. saobien_12

    saobien_12 Thành viên rất tích cực

    Tham gia ngày:
    08/08/2005
    Bài viết:
    2.918
    Đã được thích:
    0
    Có lẽ đây là câu chuyện thật mà anh đã từng kể với sao biển , không ngờ rằng anh lại giống anh victory_or_death như thế ... bây giờ anh cũng lẻ loi một mình nhưng trái tim anh dường như không ngừng tìm kiếm tình yêu ... bởi con người đa cảm , lãng mạng ...
    Đã có lúc saobiển từng là nguồn cảm hứng trong thơ anh , đã nhiều lúc anh buồn bởi thơ saobien đối lại mang tình cảm của một người khác.Anh nói răng "anh yêu cô bé trong thơ em , yêu tâm hồn em hay chính là hoá thân củaem trong thơ "....nhưng đáp lạ anh là gì :" hãy yêu em như một đưa emgái nhưng lúc buồn vui có thể kể chuyện cho nhau nghe" Vậy thôi

Chia sẻ trang này