Nhung dong thu ko duoc doc....

[My Eng is not well enough, but it seems easier when you try to say sth difficult things in foreign language...]

4.43am 14.8.07
Suddenly i feel a different part inside ... J**lous ... i know the reason... [listening "my girl" and think]

Yep. I''m J**lous now.

Want to stop, want to stop, f***

[so, all i''ve got now... lies]

you''ve made a strong impression on me, ... until now, it''s clearly wrong. So disappointed. So so so so ... pessimistic.

[should i believe sth again?]

stupid

[long long night.... long long cry... and realized sth..... so long long ...]

give me another chance to forget this once again, GOD

plz

no more ...

no more....

no more



[yesterday, my Eng teachers asked us "Have you ever felt pessimism?" ... I said this time, nal, paradoxically, i feel it now ]

that is the result for the what damn i hope ...

f***

FORGET IT

2.23pm 14.8.07
New kind of "mental breakdown", cant stop think about it, so sad, a bit foolish, a bit shy, a bit stupid, a bit .. a bit .. and a bit... huhu

too J**lous

[love 44yrc, always beside me, moah]

-- to be continue -- i know it

7.34pm 14.8.07
Just like a hit ... to my heart

heartbreak

....I will not cry

I will not cry

I''m sure

( tear ................................................................. inside .............................)

12.12am 15.8.07
Both of us, hadnt prepared yet ... for what we have done now, right? You did send me that software and letter in order to send me files ... I did borrow your stories right? and now, suddenly everything''s disappeared ... like that feeling, suddenly appeared

I dont know what to say now. I miss you? not sure. Regret? not sure, becos, feeling is somethings i cant control, i depend on it ... it comes randomly. You miss me? not sure, if not...that''s such a hit, yep, you should miss me ... somehow. You regret? not sure, you can do what you want, and that''s what you want, right? remove me out of your life, your ...eyes. It''s up to you, right.

Maybe, you did realize somethings, and you chose that way, the way I am not involved, you want to help me ... pushing that feeling away. [ push me away]

Maybe, you didnt, you had a wrong explanation for what you had read, and you chose that way, the way I am not involved, you want to forget me .... [push me away]

Both ...hurt me.

Now, i dont know what to do, how to face you, how to look at you ... in case i meet you accidentally? Let''s me smile rather than turn head away. Let''s me talk rather than just smile. Let''s me look into you eyes rather than tears.

Plz tell me that ... it hasnt said and done. that you''re still here, even it seems so far far far..

You cant read this, yep, you dont want to read this, you have gone... yep i just forgot it, that you are not here. [when you''re gone, pieces of my heart are missing you] wish i could tell that... but no more chance, as i have told GOD.

She''s lucky!
---
What''s next to me? I miss you