Tìm một con đường, tìm một lối đi...

today, i am jobless.

300809
I have left for a new company for 3 days. My first impression was that all colleagues in my department have been abroad educated. They are good at English and profession. The second was that everything here seems so quick and busy. I feel under pressure on my position. I am not familiar to take care of others. I find difficult to order dishes, book restaurants, book flight ticketsõ?Ưwhich all are done by a receptionist in the old company, not me. But now, I have to do such above stuff with my position.
Yesterday, I strolled in bookshops, my favorite hobby whenever I have free time and spend quite a lot of money on it. I have ordered a printer and a new book-self, 4.5m in length and 80cm in heigh. Hope to have them within next week.
õ?Ưuhmm 4.54pm nowõ?Ưitõ?Ts time for me to come to classõ?Ưanw, it should take a little fresh air after one day at home.
Ah..read a message I just received from my student, õ?oHihj.uj kjnh, dau doj troj chan dap dat. Keke. E bjt ruj. Hooc thujõ?..is it so fun?
020909
Fall has come for nearly half a month but I havenõ?Tt got any writings about the moment summer changed into fall though I have been waiting for this for a long time. Early days of fall have passed without my attentionõ?ƯAugustõ?Ưcrazy about a new job, new environment, new working process, new relationshipõ?Ưno time for feelings, emotionsõ?Ưsometimes wanna cry õ?Ưfelt lonely but then rushed into work immediately.
The first day parking a motorbike in the basement, I have lost the key and a USB. Nothing was more terrible than that after a late hard working day. The USB keeps so much important data and also my personal information, even diary. I had copied all soft documentations from an office PC into it when I was going to leave the old company.
Moreover, just one day after, my young relative took my cell phone to play games and terribly, she had deleted all messages I had saved for nearly one year. That hurts me deep each day after for to me, messages holds significant spiritual meaningsõ?Ư.
070909
5:20amõ?ƯNight nearly passesõ?ƯItõ?Ts time to take a quick nap before going to the office, starting a new day of a new weekõ?Ư.It seems that I will be very busy within 2 upcoming weeks because I have to go to schoolõ?Ư
.
My only happiness now is listenning music and reading books, which make my life more meaningful and my mind relieved and peaceful. They make me forget time exists.
Sometimes, I must admit that I still feel hurt. Feel pain. In such moment, I couldnõ?Tt help stiffing regardless anywhere (public or private places). My emotions still have been severely being affected by what happened in the past, by surroundings (roads, sunset, days of rain or sunlight, familiar sceneryõ?Ư)
I feel hard to overcome this period. Itõ?Ts so difficult to begin a new life with one other guyõ?ƯI need time. Need time to change myself, my thought, my attitude. Everything will change when youõ?Tre ready to change. I hope some days what I name as pain, sorrowõ?Ưwill be nonsense anymore. I am trying hard to catch that dayõ?Ư
Oh..sleep nowõ?Ư

130909
8:43õ?Ư13õ?Tminutes lateõ?ƯI should have been in class nowõ?Ưbut you know, I am sitting here, at home, writing diary. I must do that. I must take care of my own emotions before they are huffish to make me irritated, unpleasant for a whole dayõ?ƯToday is a busy day. Really. Luckily that I had enjoyment time yesterdayõ?Ưwatched Hangover, a comic movie (but crappy^^), quick viewed Business analysis and learned French. Since I moved to the new company, my tutor could not come to the office to teach me. So, I have to teach myself until I could arrange time and a suitable place. Not sure about you but the deep understanding about English phonetics helps me lots in French study. Thereõ?Ts a web giving guideline on French pronunciation which I find very interested. I can recognize which French sound is similar to English sound, how to open the mouth, move the tongue õ?Ưso excited to know that.
This time, I usually listen to French music rather than English, especially when I need concentration though I donõ?Tt understand their meanings^^
The book-self has been delivered and installed but Im not 100% satisfied cos it doesnõ?Tt follow much the initial design. Anw, in general, it looks ok, I just havenõ?Tt got enough time to rearrange books as well as all kinds of papers and other documentationõ?Ư.May be next week^^.
õ?Ư.Yesterday, late in the morning, the sky got especially bright after the rain which reminded me a day of June last year when we were still a happy couple. Nothing special, we just went out for lunch and looked for õ?oqua hong biõ?, one kind of fruit that I favor but it is likely that I have been impressed by that moment so much that it has been hanged on my mind. Weather usually wakens my old emotionsõ?Ư
Anw, whatever the memory is, it just belongs to me only.
õ?Ư
õ?Ư
õ?ƯSundayõ?ƯI have no Sunday.
19:40õ?Ư130909õ?Ư
do I forget time? Just know that when I wake up, it means s a new day has come and when I go to bed, it means one day has endedõ?Ưso quickõ?Ưthat I couldnõ?Tt do anything good. Wish this new week passed quicklyõ?Ư
22:00 130909
Feel a total wreck. Exhausted and tired to deathõ?Ư.seems that I can not bear any moreõ?Ư.boss pressure, work pressure, time pressureõ?Ưall are overloadedõ?Ưyou want to break down all, leave such damn things behindõ?Ưwhat will be will beõ?Ưlet it beõ?Ư
Everything is so messy and rushedõ?ƯI have stucked between a rock and hard place for nearly 2 monthsõ?Ư1 month crazy about the event organizationõ?Ư2 weeks mad in the new company with a slave driver. Ok, it is not a long time but I am always suffering pressure (visible and invisible, worthy and unworthy) and feeling unrespectedõ?Ư
11:04pm 260909
õ?ƯThe 2nd jobless day, I stayed at home, cleaned the house, went to market, cooked meals, surfed Net and read a bookõ?ƯI had no intention to find a job at least 2 or 3 months but I am a little worried because the Tet coming after that will make me more difficult to get jobs. Anw, this is the time I need to relax, release any pressure and stress. Hope I will fully enjoy this time, not worry about what will happen aheadõ?Ưhope that I have enough confidence, belief and positive thinking to complete my own plansõ?Ư
Yesterday, I sent a message to Beo: õ?oChúng nó (ABC) 'Ê quyỏt 'ỏằ

121109
I havenõ?Tt cried for so many months until today. I havenõ?Tt written or couldnõ?Tt write for many months until today cos there was nothing new, nothing encouraged me to say out. But today is the day. Maybe I have repressed so many things and now itõ?Ts time to burst outõ?Ư.
Love
Just one word: Bitter
All of us know how to start a relaltionship but just few guys know how to end it so that either or both can suffer the least painõ?Ưso that if some day, memory wakes up, it will not sting us and we can smile.
Are there few guys to understand this???
If someone thinks that he has to ill-treat his beloved to let her forget him, it is a terrible mistake, totally wrong. She can forget him but it doesnõ?Tt mean that she forgets tears, bitter words or cruel behaviors, all what she had to experience, all pain she has sufferedõ?ƯSo, men, do you think you should learn how to have a good end with your girlfriends?
Has friendship ever existed between ex-lovers? Yes, if they have both good start and good end.
I write these words when I feel regretful for what used to be great and now has gone so far away. Never come back. My friend told me that I could not expect others to do what you wish. That is life.

http://www.nhaccuatui.com/nghe?M=1VmwLRDf4Z
Experience - Diana Ross
(B. Gibb/R. Gibb/M. Gibb/A. Gibb)
See me loving you
A fool without a lover
How can that possibly be
Maybe you can show me why
I shiver when you''re closer
I remember your touch without it
Let me drown in your ecstasy
It''s got to be do or die
Don''t tell me love is just one night
I know it''s not true
There should be someone there to catch you
When the rain falls
And you can turn away my heaven
And maybe I was wrong
I depended on the inner voice of
Experience, or just imagination
Whatever you believe in, you can lose
And one way or the other, we can find
Another world we can run away to
I''m living for the
Experience, is only what you make it
You live forever but you never know
That somebody loves you
And when the sky is open
Fly away lovers can share
I''ll be there
And you can make the earth move
You can take me with no struggle
Lead me through your mystical dreams
Show me what you are
And we can make the wind blow
You''re the power and I''m in it
You can be the fire I start
I want your heart
And let there be a story when the stories are told
I need to hear you say you love me when the night falls
We may never go to heaven but one thing that is sure
You can not ignore
I''ll make it more than
Experience is not imagination
You get what you believe in if you choose
Somebody loves you
I couldn''t get no higher
Fly away lovers can share
And we''ll be there
Experience is not imagination
You get what you believe in if you choose
And one way or the other
We can find another world we can run away to
And I love you
Experience is only what you make it
You come together when you let yourself go
And somebody loves you
I couldn''t get no higher
Fly away lovers can share
And we''ll be there
(Repeat last verse and fade)

Topic này của bạn solo rồi, toàn tiếng anh. Muốn chia sẻ thế này..ngu tiếng anh như mình đọc cũng thấy nản.
...Biết nói thế nào về bản thân mình, chán công việc đến đỉnh điểm rồi, tìm lối thoát, cho bản thân mình..biết ngoài kia nhiều khó khăn lắm. Nhưng..sống mãi thế này cũng vô vị quá. Ngày mai, ngày kia thôi..chẳng bao lâu nữa mình sẽ nghỉ việc ..cheer!!!

Xin lỗi bạn nếu quá lời nhưng mà TTVN online, vậy mà banj lại viết bằng Tiếng Anh, đã thế bạn lại còn viết sai ngữ pháp linh tinh. Nản.

Pls show me. Thanks I welcome any help cos my English will be improved.

Nghỉ thì cứ nghỉ thôi. Sao phải xoắn? Tớ nói đùa chút.
Nếu đã xác định nghỉ việc thì phải chuẩn bị tâm lý vững vàng đấy. Nếu ko sẽ dễ bị stress lắm.

121109
Therê?Tre days that everything becomes terrible, out of my control. I see myself so weak and easily breakable.
Malnora is not simply a nick. It?Ts my own world where no one knows who I am, where I feel free to cry, smile with my own emotions, where I find consolation and relief.
There are so many reasons for a person to create a new nick?some sensitivê?some serious?some just for fun?some private. To me,
I want to start a new life
I want to be known by no one
I want to find a secret shelter for my soul.
Simply it is.
May be that my daughter then will read this topic. If so, she will have to study English in order to understand what her mum has written. Daughter or son?
Fool - Lifehouse
http://www.nhaccuatui.com/nghe?M=Hfff79BfiJ
seems my own arrogance has knocked me off my feet again
when you know I''m crawling to you as fast as I can
first teach me to walk and then I''ll learn to dance for you like an
honest clumsy clown
tripping along the way
cause I''m reaching for you
but my arms aren''t long enough
and I''m running to you
if I could go a little faster
and I''m crying to you
but I can''t hear my own voice
and I am waiting for you
and trying not to fall asleep now
cause I''m clumsily dancing away this fear
I''m stumbling closer to you and I am
tumbling over my pride
I will be a fool for you
what are you thinking as you look down on me are you
frustrated with my inconsistency
or intrigued that I can find the will to get back up or
maybe all of this is simply amusing
cause I''m reaching for you
but my arms aren''t long enough
and I''m running to you
if I could go a little faster
and I''m crying to you
but I can''t hear my own voice
I am waiting for you
and trying not to fall asleep now
cause I''m clumsily dancing away this fear
I''m stumbling closer to you and I''m
tumbling over my pride
I will be a fool for you
cause I''m clumsily dancing away this fear
I''m stumbling closer to you and I''m
tumbling over my pride
I will be a fool
and I''m clumsily dancing away this fear
I''m stumbling closer to you and I''m
tumbling over my pride
I will be a fool for you

I wonder if you were being sarcastic. If yes, then I?Tm speechless. If no, then I?Tm sorry. I was making a just comment on what you wrote, because I know for sure that it is against the forum?Ts rule to entitle your topic in English. Thus, it may be even worse to write the whole thing in another language rather than Vietnamese. Besides, neither did I claim that I was good at English nor did I mention that I would have time to meticulously look for every single solecism in your writing. If it were your goal to improve your English then some English Club might be a better option for people there would voluntarily read, share and help you.
Được ShoeProblem sửa chữa / chuyển vào 19:58 ngày 13/11/2009

Hi Shoe,
I am waiting for your apology cos I am not mocking you. I?Tm totally serious. Any help is appreciated. Maybe today I make mistakes but tomorrow I will not repeat them. I really expect you to show what the so called ?ongu phap linh tinh? and correct it.
I don?Tt know why you see ?onản? when you read my topic??? Each person will know what is the best for him. You can choose Tieng Viet for your writing cos you find ok. I choose English cos I feel easier to express my thought. Is it not good?
English is a very popular language and nothing is special here when you use this language for your writing. You write for yourself first. To me, English or whatever is just a tool to help me say what I think.
One more thing, it is true that I want to improve my English and I am still trying to make it better day by day. And if it is, what is wrong when I write here??? Thanks for your idea about some English clubs but you should have told me some years ago when free time was available for me.
I can send you PM to correct your English mistakes if you want. You can too. I just don?Tt want my topic to be off track.
Cheers,