Tongue Fu: how to talk when you don't know what to talk

To some difficult poeple, situations you don''t know that to talk. Vietnamese says '' hand-tied'', ''leg-tied'' (bó tay, bó chân), English says '' tongue-tied'' (bó lưỡi). Then how to untie your tongue, say something when you don''t know what to say. We need Tongue Fu or Kung-Fu of tongue.

Let me show some situations make me tongue-tied. Please help me and share with us yours. Then together we try to find out solutions and improve our Eight skills (kỹ năng Tám)

1) My friend ''s girlfriend left him. I dun know what so say to him, except inviting him for a drink. I can''t tell him ''just forget about her, there are a lot of good girls out there'' even thought it is truth

2) My friend ''s mother, teacher ''s husband passed away. They died young, the pain and loss are too large to the stayed people.

What would you say in such situations?

Note: Tongue Fu is a name of a book by an American female writer.
3)For girls: what if a guy asks you '' did you put some weights on you?''
4) When will you ''get'' a boyfriend/girlfriend? (if you ''feel'' too old and hopeless)

What a nice topic to share and discuss !
Tongue Fu or Kung-Fu of tongue is sometimes unnecessary, silence is the best way of sharing and understanding. However, we still need to say something to express our thoughts upon the situation . Here are my suggestion:
1) My friend ''''s girlfriend left him. I dun know what so say to him, except inviting him for a drink. I can''''t tell him ''''just forget about her, there are a lot of good girls out there'''' even thought it is truth
=> Inviting him out is a good pain release. You can also let some of your friends join in to bring him more fun and prevent him from thinking of that "bad" girl .
What you might say is :
- That is just love, there are a lot of other things for us to care for, think about and put effort such as: job, promotion, friend, social position, youth,etc.
- I believe you will be ok soon. I know you are strong and know what to do.
- Experience makes us more mature and perfects our mind and makes our life meaningful.
2) My friend ''''s mother, teacher ''''s husband passed away. They died young, the pain and loss are too large to the stayed people.
=> Base on the closeness of the relations, you might hold their hands, embrace them and keep silent. That is enough. Words seem to be useless in this situation, body languages are more suitable. I even do not know what to say.

Thanks for reply, Ms. Di. I agree what you say is truth. Or they are what people would normally say in such situations. But I dun think they will work out.
--''That is just love...'' . To some (and at that time),love is everything, they will get angry if we say that
--I believe you will be ok soon. I know you are strong and know what to do. Like cheating ourself
--Experience makes us more mature and perfects our mind and makes our life meaningful. Sounds like a teacher
( I run now)

1) My friend ''''s girlfriend left him. I dun know what so say to him, except inviting him for a drink. I can''''t tell him ''''just forget about her, there are a lot of good girls out there'''' even thought it is truth---->''Cos I''m a lady, so I will protect ...ladies''right. I will say: If I were her, I would... aslo leave you as she did, he he
2) My friend ''''s mother, teacher ''''s husband passed away. They died young, the pain and loss are too large to the stayed people.
----> I will wait ''till they cry...and ask: ''Do you want my shoulders to cry on? It''s free.''

3)For girls: what if a guy asks you '''' did you put some weights on you?'''' ----> Yes, I did, ''cos someone threw it away and I can''t waste it.
Just kidding, I don''t think there''s such an unawareness boy, if so, I won''t say anything after his question.
4) When will you ''''get'''' a boyfriend/girlfriend? (if you ''''feel'''' too old and hopeless)
---->tomorrow of tomorrow

You make me laugh FJX.One thing I want to ask for help and I think you girls are very good at: how to bargain in markets. Normally I just buy and walk away when a saler gives a price. I dun know how to bargain, dun know what to say (luckily, now we have suppermarkets) . Help please.

Just do this:
then ask them for any price you want to...

Có cái người ta nói thách 100k, trả giá 50k--->bán luôn--->hết biết (thiệt sự giá bao nhiêu, mình bị hố bao nhiêu )

Well, when you don''t know what to say, say nothing at all.