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Truyện cười tiếng anh

Chủ đề trong 'Truyện cười' bởi HuyenBarbie, 20/01/2015.

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  1. HuyenBarbie

    HuyenBarbie Thành viên mới

    Tham gia ngày:
    16/01/2015
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    Truyện cười tiếng Anh
    Hãy cùng đọc một vài mẩu truyện cười thú vị sau đây cùng Ms Tuyến English nhé. Hãy luyện đọc thành tiếng những câu truyện này để tăng khả năng nói tiếng anh của bạn!

    1. Strange thing
    A French boy said to his friend:
    - My younger sister is ten years old but she can speak English rather well.
    His friend smiled and replied:
    - It isn’t a strange thing. When my family travelled to London, I met a little girl who was about five years old and she spoke English like the wind.

    2. Children’s questions
    A three-year old walks over to a pregnant lady while waiting with his mother in a doctor’s office.
    “Why is your stomach so big?” – he asks.
    She replies,“I´m having a baby.”
    “Is the baby in your stomach?” – he asks, with his big eyes.
    “Yes, it is.” – she says.
    “Is it a good baby?” – he asks, with a puzzled look.
    “Oh, yes. A really good baby.” – the lady replies.
    Shocked and surprised, he asks: “Then why did you eat him?”

    3. I love you
    A man was out for a drink with his wife one night and he said, “I love you”.
    The wife asked, “Is that you or the beer talking?”
    He said, “It’s me…….. I’m talking to the beer”!



    [​IMG]

    4. The best restaurant
    There were three restaurants on the same block. One day, one of them put up a sign which said “The Best Restaurant in the City”

    The next day, the largest restaurant on the block put up a larger sign which said “The Best Restaurant in the World”

    On the third day, the smallest restaurant put up a small sign which said “The Best Restaurant on this Block.”



    5. Strength vs. Intelligence
    A strong young man at the construction site was bragging that he could outdo anyone in a feat of strength. He made a special case of making fun of John, one of the older workmen. After several minutes, John had enough.

    “Why don’t you put your money where your mouth is?” he said. “I will bet a week’s wages that I can haul something in a wheelbarrow over to that outbuilding that you won’t be able to wheel back.”

    “You’re on, old man,” the braggart replied. “It’s a bet! Let’s see what you got.”

    John reached out and grabbed the wheelbarrow by the handles. Then, nodding to the young man, he said, “All right. Get in.”



    6. Fishing
    Saturday morning I got up early, put on my long johns, dressed quietly, made my lunch, grabbed the dog, slipped quietly into the garage to hook up the boat to the truck, and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour.

    There was snow mixed with the rain, and the wind was blowing at 50 mph.

    I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad throughout the day.

    I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed. There I cuddled up to my wife’s back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, “The weather out there is terrible.”

    She sleepily replied, “Can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that crap ?..”
  2. HuyenBarbie

    HuyenBarbie Thành viên mới

    Tham gia ngày:
    16/01/2015
    Bài viết:
    13
    Đã được thích:
    0
    Nếu mà có thể tự dịch sẽ rất là nhớ đấy bạn à :)
  3. mai.nguyenvn

    mai.nguyenvn Thành viên rất tích cực

    Tham gia ngày:
    06/06/2012
    Bài viết:
    371
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    90
    Chồng đưa vợ đến bệnh viện sinh. Bác sĩ gợi ý sử dụng máy chuyển cơn đau của vợ sang chồng. Cả hai đồng ý. Khi vợ sinh, bác sĩ nhấn nút chuyển cơn đau 10 % và cho biết bắt đầu với tỉ lệ này là vì chồng chưa từng trải cơn đau đẻ. Lúc vợ chuyển dạ, chồng vẫn không đau. Anh yêu cầu bác sĩ quay nút 20 % để giảm đau cho vợ. Bác sĩ kinh ngạc thấy anh chịu đau bình thản, lại văn nút 50 %. Chồng vẫn tỉnh bơ. Nút quay đến 100 %… Vợ sinh đứa bé kháu khỉnh mà chẳng hề đau đớn. Họ tỏ ý thán phục công nghệ mới. Mọi việc tốt đẹp đến khi họ về nhà và nghe tin ông hàng xóm vừa mới chết vì 1 cơn đau..

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