WOMEN AND MEN

ROMANCE MATHEMATICS
Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy
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OFFICE ARITHMETIC
Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime
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SHOPPING MATH
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that
she doesn't need.
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GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
A woman worries about the future until she
gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until
he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money
than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
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HAPPINESS
To be happy with a man, you must understand him
a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
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LONGEVITY
Married men live longer than single men, but
married men are a lot more willing to die.
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MEMORY
Any married man should forget his mistakes, there's
no use in two people remembering the same thing.
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APPEARANCE
Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
Women somehow deteriorate during the night.
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PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
A woman marries a man expecting he will change,
but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't
change, and she does.
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DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything
a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
_______________________________________________
COMPREHENSION
There are 2 times when a man doesn't understand
a woman - before marriage and after marriage.
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HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING
MARRIED:
Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking
me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next."
They stopped after I started doing the same thing
to them at funerals.



Đã bao lần lý trí bảo trái tim
Thôi ko iu,o giận hờn,o nhớ
Nhưng trái tim thật là quái gở
Cứ rì rào tha thiết gọi tên em

Trùi ạ, Chiqui ko dịch nổi, bác nào giỏi giỏ dich hộ em cái nhẻ?? Chả hiểu có hay ko đây?? Hic...Chiqui muốn bít quá ...Thi thoảng mới thấy bác Cạp post được 1 bài dài dài, ko "câu cá", hic, thế mà em dốt quá...Nào, mọi người dịch hộ cái nhẻ??
Chiquichita

Cái này đọc trên TTVN lâu lâu rùi !
Q@

Tui chả biết bác nói cái gì cả, bác phiên vịt ra dùm tui cái.
p/s: Tiếng miền Nam đọc chữ v thành chữ d vì thế dịch=vịt

chả thấy bác cạp lên tiếng thương thuyết gì cả nhể!
em học ban C nên dốt toán lắm các bác ạ!
moonsnow